Making a Difference in the Lives of Others

There are some people who always talk about making a difference and then there are those who actually DO it without all the talk.  Eric Moore was the latter.  When I checked into Facebook before bed Sunday night, I read the news but couldn't quite process it.  I thought people were singing his praises because of some accomplishment until I saw the letters R.I.P. I was heartbroken!  It didn't seem real.  He just celebrated a birthday and, because of procrastination, I didn't even get a chance to wish him a happy one.

Although Eric is no longer with us in the physical body, he will always remain with me (and countless others) in spirit.  His social media page is flooded with accolades for all he has meant to students, black sports information directors and black college sports in general for more than 40 years.  

I met "Mr. Moore" in 1977 as a student at Ohio University.  He taught RTV-400 (film editing class).  It was a required class.  Imagine my surprise when I saw he was black.  He was the ONLY black face in the Communications department.  He was young and handsome and very personable.  I just knew I was going to do well in his class because he wouldn't dare fail a sista'  Yeah, right!  After a few missed assignments, he pulled me aside and told me I needed to get my act together because I wasn't passing.  I decided to drop the class and sign up again at a later time.  And guess what?  I got him again!  This time I was like a sponge in learning everything he had to teach about editing.  I had something to prove and I wanted him to know I was determined to shine.  (I finished with a B in the class as I recall).

Over the years, I stayed in touch with him to thank him for lighting a fire under me and not letting me slide for the Black and Proud movement.  Every time I had to splice some audio tape in the newsroom, I thought of him and all that I had learned.  He was my mentor.

Who knew that when I moved to NC our paths would cross again.  He was in Raleigh--less than 30 minutes from me.  We would see each other at the CIAA Tournament games and catch up for old time sake.  We chatted on the phone occasionally and I always asked about Betty and the children (who weren't the "little ones" I remembered).

What I discovered was he never stopped teaching and helping young people develop their media craft. A number of us from Ohio U fondly reflect on his guidance and support.  He poured so much  of his knowledge into so many and made everyone feel important.

So much love pouring out on his FB page:

The man… The legend… The GURU!!! My first mentor in the athletic profession who helped develop me over rhe years! Rest easy  Eric N. Moore! You are the best to do it on this side of heaven! You will definitely be missed.  ~Tonia Walker  

I am truly grateful for knowing Eric N. Moore! My Sports Information days became so much easier when his “little Worrisome Child” would call him if I could not figure something out and he would calmly say, ”T, just breathe it’s nothing a click or the push of a key can’t fix.” T.t. White

In each life, if you’re lucky you get chance at having incredible wisdom, personal experience, intelligence, laughter and genuine care and concern pass your way, it makes you soar. Eric N. Moore was indeed an educator ahead of his time and wished that for us all. ~Ricardo Morgan

If you had a stressful day, his laugh would definitely change that. Mr. Moore, as I always called him, was one of the more selfless people I have come across. He took pride in helping others succeed. ~Sean Robinson

 "Moore, 71, was an innovator with his www.onnidan.com website, but more than that he helped anybody in the business who needed it."  John Dell

He truly made a difference and I am forever grateful that our paths crossed.

(photo courtesy of onnidan.com)

When Teens Lose a Loved One

My grandson's great grandfather (on his father's side) passed away unexpectedly sometime between late last night and early this morning.  He died in his sleep.  My daughter called us shortly before 2:00 am with the devastating news and, without hesitation, we got out of bed and rushed over to the house where family members had already gathered.  

I could see the heartbreak and pain on my grandson's face.  He and his "pawpaw" were very close and "pawpaw" made no secret that Jarod was his favorite out of all of the great-grands.  In that moment, I was at a loss for words but I needed to hug him and let him know it was going to be all right even though it didn't feel that way at the moment.  Jarod has never experienced death on this magnitude.  Yes, he has known people who died but they were either very old (and expected) or they were casual acquaintances who got mixed up with the wrong crowd which led to their untimely demise.

I couldn't help thinking that Jarod was going to experience this trauma many more times as those he loves pass away.  I knew, in that moment, that I wouldn't be able to shield him from the grief he is going through now and what he will feel in the future.  

Death is never easy to deal with and it's got to be extremely hard for young people who spend their young lives loving their older grandparents, aunts, uncles, etc.  

I can't do it now but at some point I will let him know:

1.  It's OK to grieve.  It's normal.  Holding your emotions inside will only create turmoil on down the road.

2.  You will get through it, even though it doesn't feel like it right now.

3.  You're not alone.  Others have feelings they have to work through as it relates to the loved one's death.

4.  Cherish the memories and when you're ready, share them with others.  It will help the healing process.

5.  Allow your best friend to be there for you.  Shutting everyone out can lead to isolation and a state of depression.

The experts say it's never a good idea to direct what a grieving teenager should do, say or feel.  Don't force them to talk if they don't want to---but when he's ready I'll be there.

I know my time is coming, too, at some point.