Being Broke Ain't No Joke

A little old lady answered a knock on the door one day, only to be confronted by a well-dressed young man carrying a vacuum cleaner.

"Good morning," said the young man. "If I could take a couple of minutes of your time, I would like to demonstrate the very latest in high-powered vacuum cleaners."

"Go away!" said the old lady. "I'm broke and haven't got any money!" and she proceeded to close the door. Quick as a flash, the young man wedged his foot in the door and pushed it wide open. "Don't be too hasty!" he said. "Not until you have at least seen my demonstration." And with that, he emptied a bucket of horse manure onto her hallway carpet.

"If this vacuum cleaner does not remove all traces of this horse manure from your carpet, Madam, I will personally eat the remainder."

The old lady stepped back and said, 'Well let me get you a fork, 'cause they cut off my electricity this morning.'

What part of “I'm broke” don't you understand?

Grandkids Say the Darndest Things

Being a baby boomer grandma is kind of fun---but also very interesting. Now that my two-year-old grandson can talk and formulate understandable phrases, it is amazing to hear some of the things that come out of his mouth. What's even more shocking is the timing of what he says. How he knows what to say at a particular moment baffles me. For instance, one day I was getting ready to take a shower and looked at me and asked, "Grandma, you stink, stink?"

Here are some other grandchild-grandparent encounters shared by other grandparents:

My young grandson called the other day to wish me Happy Birthday. He asked me how old I was, and I told him, "62." My grandson was quiet for a moment, and then he asked, "Did you start at 1?"

A little girl was diligently pounding away on her grandfather’s word processor. She told him she was writing a story. "What’s it about?" he asked. "I don’t know," she replied. "I can’t read."

I didn’t know if my granddaughter had learned her colors yet, so I decided to test her. I would point out something and ask what color it was. She would tell me and was always correct. It was fun for me, so I continued. At last, she headed for the door, saying, "Grandma, I think you should try to figure out some of these, yourself!"

When my grandson asked me how old I was, I teasingly replied, "I’m not sure." "Look in your underwear, Grandpa," he advised, "Mine says I’m 4 to 6."

What funny thing(s) have your grandchildren said to you?

You can have holiday cards made with all of the sweet things your little ones said. And bring joy to everyone you send them to!