Friday, November 30, 2007

A Family Affair: Baby Boomer Style

One of the things my husband and I talked about when we were dating (a few years ago) was the fact that we were going to put ourselves in a position of being financially independent. We weren’t going to rely on Corporate America to take care of us into retirement.

We are two intelligent and highly motivated individuals who still have dreams and passions at midlife. When circumstances forced me to give up my television news job last year, my husband stepped up and became the wind beneath my wings. He helped me soar to my greatest heights on a new career path and, sometimes, had to guide me back in the right direction when I was steering off course.

He now understands why I spend so many hours on the computer doing research and answering emails and promoting what I do. He’s finally figuring out the fact that menopause pays benefits and so does “all things baby boomer.”

But more importantly, he is pursuing his own midlife passions with a goal to be healthy and fit for as long as possible. www.healthylivingboomerstyle.com

Please join me in welcoming my better baby boomer half into cyberspace. Also check out his blog: www.healthylivingboomerstyle.blogspot.com

You’re going to be hearing A LOT from us!

Sunday, November 25, 2007

When children lose someone they care about

The day after Thanksgiving the grandmother of my daughter’s best friend passed away. It was expected, but as with any death where illness is involved, family and friends are always hopeful that the end will come later instead of sooner.

I watched in awe as my teenage daughter became a pillar of strength for her friend who was obviously very close to her grandmother. From the moment the decision was made to take her off of the respirator, my daughter stepped up to offer comfort to her friend in the best way she could. She went to the hospital and maintained a vigil with the family. She left---only to return again at midnight---when she learned of her passing.

Just last month I found myself in the same situation when I lost a dear friend. It was if my daughter had watched my every move because she was doing what I had done.

It is expected that baby boomers, like me, will lose older family members and friends as time goes by but when children lose people they care about, it can be a hard concept to truly understand. Hopefully, parents are teaching their children to love, appreciate and respect their aging family members while they’re alive so that when they’re gone, they will have cherished memories to hold on to.

Friday, November 23, 2007

Thanksgiving in the E.R.

Instead of watching E.R. on TV on Thursday night, the scenes played out in real life as my husband and I spent more than six hours in the Duke Medical Center emergency room on Thanksgiving night with my mother-in-law.

To give you a little background: my mother-in-law is in the latter stages of Alzheimers. We moved her from her home in South Carolina to a home care facility close to us in NC so we could look after her better.

The night before Thanksgiving, she apparently fell and sprained her left arm while wandering in the middle of the night. She was taken to the E.R. where a cast was placed on her arm. On Thanksgiving Day, her son picked her up so she could spend part of the day with us and have dinner.

While I was distracted with completing dinner, my mother-in-law decided to remove the cast from her arm. This resulted in major swelling and since no one knew how to put the cast back on without having a major fight on our hands, we figured the best thing to do was to take her back the E.R. to have them do it.

I thought we would be out in an hour max because how long does it take to replace an arm cast? Well, it actually took more than six hours because cases kept coming in that became priority over her:

Case #1: Young man shot in the abdomen while sitting on his front porch. Suspects unknown.

Case #2: Two-year-old sticks popcorn kernel up his nose and required emergency surgery to remove it.

Case #3: DUI driver runs a red light and hits a car full of people who were returning home after visiting family for Thanksgiving.

Case #4: Young pregnant woman has too much to drink and goes into some kind of seizure.

I don’t know if it’s just Duke’s E.R. but their customer service was absolutely HORRIBLE!!! I don’t even want to think about the kind of treatment we could’ve received if we didn’t have insurance.

It was an interesting night and one that kept me from missing the traditional Black Friday shopping spree because I couldn’t get out of bed. I'm also beginning to understand the role many baby boomers, like myself, are going to have to play when it comes to dealing with aging parents.

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Sesame Street For Adults Only?

Movies like Debbie Does Dallas have a warning label because they're x-rated but a warning label on a Sesame Street DVD? Are you kidding?

According to an article written by Virginia Heffernan in the NY Times magazine, there is a warning on Volumes 1 and 2, “Sesame Street: Old School” indicating the videos are for adults-only: “These early ‘Sesame Street’ episodes are intended for grown-ups, and may not suit the needs of today’s preschool child.”

Sesame Street wasn't around for my baby boomer generation but my daughter grew up watching it. Sesame Street taught her about respect, the importance of learning and what it meant to be a good neighbor and better friend. It was OK to ask for an adult stranger's help and not worry about being abducted or abused. Who cared if Oscar the Grouch was always grumpy or if Cookie Monster ate too much junk food?

How sad to think the old Sesame Street neighborhood has become a victim of urban renewal.


"Come and play! Everything's A-OK.
Friendly neighbors there, that's where we meet.
Can you tell me how to get, how to get to Sesame Street?"

Sunday, November 18, 2007

I'm Baby Boomer 305.24

It seems like our lives are identified by numbers. We have a social security number, driver’s license number and credit card numbers. We even have to have a number to identify the size of our clothes and shoes. Some of us have an incarceration number which, like your driver’s and social security numbers, will never go away.

But I learned recently that I have another number to add to my list. That number identifies me at my public library. That’s right. My book, Whatever! A Baby Boomer’s Journey Into Middle Age is in my local library! It sits right on the shelf alongside the autobiographies of former Secretary of State Colin Powell and Fox News Anchor Bill O’Reilly, to name a few.

It’s truly an honor to see my book sitting in a place with millions of other books. I worked hard on my book and even lost my job over it. Unlike other baby boomer authors, some who got wonderful five and six figure publishing deals, no one wanted to invest in me---so I had to invest in myself (or should I say my husband did). I still don’t have a distributor but it didn’t stop me from getting my book on amazon.com and barnesandnoble.com. Last week, my book reached the Top 100 on Amazon in the Aging category. That’s quite an accomplishment from someone whose advertising budget came more from her drive and determination instead of her pocketbook.

Even with all of the numbers I have to try to remember, I don’t mind being baby boomer 305.24. I do have a problem with my dress size though and I’m definitely working to change it!

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Cosmetic Surgery and African-American Baby Boomers

Even though there is no “official” word on the cause of death for the mother of Hip Hop Rap Star Kanye West, there are plenty of rumors flying around that she died as the result of some complications connected to cosmetic surgery. Unsubstantiated reports indicate 58-year-old Dr. Donda West went into the hospital for a breast reduction and tummy tuck. According to CNN reports, A Beverly Hills plastic surgeon said he consulted with West several months earlier but refused to perform the procedure without a medical clearance. In a statement released through his publicist, Dr. Andre Aboolian said, "I always insist on a medical clearance for women over 40, and in this instance it was particularly important because of a condition she had that I felt could have led to a heart attack." It is believed West suffered from hypertension.

Undoubtedly there will be many questions raised about the doctor who actually performed the procedure. Did he get a medical clearance? If not, why? Was he aware of any pre-existing conditions? If so, how influential was the patient in getting him to ignore them?

West is among an increasingly growing number of baby boomers who have chosen plastic surgery as an option to either enhance their appearance or minimize the signs of aging. What is even more interesting is the fact that more and more minorities are choosing the procedure. According to the American Society of Plastic Surgeons, Hispanics lead the way with the number cosmetic procedures. Statistics from 2005 indicated more than 900,000 Hispanics had some type of plastic surgery. That’s nearly a million people. African-Americans weren’t far behind with more than 760,000. Overall, there were nearly 2.3 million procedures performed---which represents an increase of 65 percent from 2004.

The death of Dr. West will re-ignite the debate over whether cosmetic surgery is necessary. I can’t help but think how sad it is that we have become a society so obsessed with appearance. And shame on the so-called professionals obsessed with making the all mighty dollar all in the name of beauty. Whatever happened to “I love you just the way you are.”

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Meet the Bloggers from the Hallmark Conference

After I accepted the invitation for the all-expenses paid trip to the Hallmark Bloggers Conference in Kansas City, I learned I would be one of about a half dozen bloggers from around the country attending.

I kept thinking to myself, “How did they find me?” It was the SAME REACTION I had when I was interviewed for the New York Times. My Publicist says I’m more popular than I think I am. Well, if that’s the case, why haven’t I sold a million books yet?

WHATEVER!

Anyway, my first contact with the others came on the morning of the conference. (I got in too late to try to socialize the night before). I wasn’t surprised that I was the only African-American but I was a little surprised at the make-up of the group. Four of us were Baby Boomers and the other three were Echo Boomers I guess (all under the age of 30).

The person I recognized right away was Dotsie Bregal for the NABBW. She looks just like her picture on my Baby Boomer Diva Web of Fame.

The person I seemed to gravitate towards almost immediately was Jerry Stearns. Jerry has a blog called: yourlifeafter50.com I learned that Jerry was from Fargo, ND. He’s the first person I’ve ever met from there. He’s married with children and he’s not someone who sends cards just because---but what man really does? I liked Jerry. He wasn’t pretentious and I learned during lunch that he had a softer, gentler side.

Jennette Fulda is apparently known as the PastaQueen. Why I don’t remember. I must have been having a menopausal moment when she was talking. But to tell you the truth, she was the quiet one in the group---so quiet that I hardly knew she was there unless she was right in my face. I recall her saying she lost quite a bit of weight---50 pounds or more I think. She was from Indianapolis.

The “Valley Girl” in the group was Stephanie Quilao. Her website is: www.backinskinnyjeans.com Stephanie was proud to proclaim that she lost 25 pounds so far and she wanted Hallmark to offer cards of encouragement for people who were fighting the battle of the bulge. She was spunky and pleasant to be around and quite knowledgeable about the blogging world.

Elizabeth Thielke hailed from Nashville. She is the author of three websites. I like the www.busymom.net one the best. Her genbetween.com website is quite informative. I learned that Liz and I shared a few things in common. We’re both only children and taking care of our elderly parents. Her mother has Alzheimer’s---so does my mother-in-law.

Last but not least was Sylvia Hall. She was the only “local” person in the group. Sylvia loves to write and dreams of getting a Hallmark gig someday. In her “other” life, she’s a teacher. I learned that we also share something in common: we both write for www.passionateforlife.com

I visited her blog: www.sylvias-journal.blogspot.com. She’s very colorful with words and is obviously very passionate about her writing.

I’m glad I got a chance to meet these bloggers because, otherwise, I would’ve probably never interacted with them in cyberspace.

My picks would’ve been different because it would’ve been based on who I’ve already been in contact with and interact with the most:

Mark: GoingLikeSixty.com
Rhea: thegeminiweb.com
Shirley: fabulousafterfifty.blogspot.com
Eileen: feistysideoffifty.com
Carine: whats-cooking.blogspot.com
Sharon: babyboomeradvisorclub.wordpress.com
Angela: angelabetts.com
A representative from womensvoicesforchange.org
And Me, of course!

If you want to see the bloggers go to, www.enjoyyourmenopause.com/hallmark_bloggers.html

Then check out the blog contest and add your name to the winners list, like Karen O'Bannon from Louisville, KY. http://www.enjoyyourmenopause.com/hallmark_contest.html

Passing the Torch from Baby Boomers to Millennials to Gen Z

Whether baby boomers can accept it or not, a changing of the guard has taken place with  millennials and the up and coming Gen Z generations...