My Grandson Spends Another Fatherless Year because of Lamar Bass

On December 26, 2005, my grandson's father was shot to death at the age of 16. People initially wanted to label it as a gang-related murder but because I was a journalist working on the story, I REFUSED to allow police to label it that way before they did a complete investigation.

One year later, the suspect was convicted, at the age of 17, and sentenced to life in prison. You can read more about the story as reported by WRAL NEWS Here's what the suspect has been up to since he was incarcerated:

Infraction Type
12/11/2014 PROFANE LANGUAGE
12/11/2014 ATTEMPT CLASS A OFFENSE
11/29/2014 DISOBEY ORDER
11/16/2014 DISOBEY ORDER
11/12/2014 DISOBEY ORDER
11/12/2014 ASSAULT STAFF/THROWING LIQUIDS
11/12/2014 ASSAULT STAFF W/WEAPON
09/11/2014 DISOBEY ORDER
07/21/2014 THREATEN TO HARM/INJURE STAFF
07/17/2014 PROFANE LANGUAGE
07/17/2014 THREATEN TO HARM/INJURE STAFF
07/17/2014 ASSAULT STAFF/THROWING LIQUIDS
07/17/2014 DISOBEY ORDER
07/17/2014 PROFANE LANGUAGE
04/13/2014 NO THREAT CONTRABAND
04/13/2014 POSS AUDIO/VIDEO/IMAGE DEVICE
12/12/2013 DISOBEY ORDER
12/12/2013 SEXUAL ACT
06/12/2012 FLOOD CELL
06/12/2012 SET A FIRE
06/11/2012 ASSAULT STAFF/THROWING LIQUIDS
05/16/2012 DISOBEY ORDER
05/16/2012 ASSLT STAFF W/UNLIKELY INJ
03/21/2012 DISOBEY ORDER
03/21/2012 SEXUAL ACT
03/06/2012 DISOBEY ORDER
03/06/2012 SEXUAL ACT
03/03/2012 SEXUAL ACT
03/01/2012 SEXUAL ACT
02/22/2012 DISOBEY ORDER
02/22/2012 SEXUAL ACT
02/08/2012 DISOBEY ORDER
02/08/2012 SEXUAL ACT
01/27/2012 INVOLVEMENT W/GANG OR STG
01/19/2012 PROVOKE ASSAULT
01/19/2012 INVOLVEMENT W/GANG OR STG
12/07/2011 DISOBEY ORDER
12/07/2011 PROFANE LANGUAGE
12/07/2011 LOCK TAMPERING
12/04/2011 UNAUTHORIZED LOCATION
10/09/2011 DISOBEY ORDER
08/19/2011 DISOBEY ORDER
08/12/2011 SEXUAL ACT
05/02/2011 MISUSE/UNAUTH-USE PHONE/MAIL
05/02/2011 INVOLVEMENT W/GANG OR STG
08/05/2010 MISUSE/UNAUTH-USE PHONE/MAIL
08/05/2010 INVOLVEMENT W/GANG OR STG
04/20/2010 INVOLVEMENT W/GANG OR STG
04/10/2010 INVOLVEMENT W/GANG OR STG
08/13/2009 INVOLVEMENT W/GANG OR STG
08/13/2009 ASSAULT PERSON W/WEAPON
04/22/2009 HIGH RISK ACT
04/11/2009 DISOBEY ORDER
04/11/2009 PROFANE LANGUAGE
02/01/2009 SEXUAL ACT
09/07/2008 PROFANE LANGUAGE
08/08/2008 SEXUAL ACT
04/12/2008 MISUSE/UNAUTH-USE PHONE/MAIL
11/08/2007 INVOLVEMENT W/GANG OR STG
08/15/2007 INVOLVEMENT W/GANG OR STG
07/25/2007 DISOBEY ORDER
05/30/2007 UNAUTHORIZED LOCATION
05/30/2007 FIGHTING
05/06/2007 DISOBEY ORDER

A LOST CAUSE!!!!!

Playing Hooky with My Grandson

When you were growing up did you ever play hooky from school? I did once or twice that I can recall. Last week I decided to play hooky from work. I called it a "Mental Health Day." Lord knows, when you work in 8 hours a day, 5 days a week, 160+ hours a month, you need to take a break even when you aren't really sick. I chose to call out because my eight-year-old grandson had the day off and I just felt like hanging out with him.

Since he spent the night before at my house, I thought for sure he would take advantage of a sleep-in day but noooooooooooo! He had to wake up BEFORE 8am with a growling stomach. That meant I had to get up and make breakfast. That's what grandmas do.

I planned a fun afternoon that included lunch and a movie out of town. So what would we see? I wanted to see the movie with Melissa McCarthy and Bill Murray but my grandson was convinced that I wanted to see Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day. Never mind that he just saw the movie two days before, he was so sure I really would want to see that movie. So guess what? We went to see it and began the 20 minute trip from Durham to Morrisville. We didn't get there in time for the 12:15 showing so we bought tickets for the 2:30 showing and just hung out in the plaza area.

Since we weren't really hungry yet, we decided to pass the time away by throwing coins in the water fountain in front of the theater and by playing tag around this Christmas tree centered in the middle of the plaza.

After working up a hunger, we ate at Bad Daddy's which was right next door to the movie theater. And then it was showtime. We discovered we were the ONLY ones in the theater for the movie and that was pretty cool! And yes, my grandson was right. I really did like that movie.

It was a great mental health day for me and I was refreshed and revitalized to return to work the next day.

Just Call Me Mama Bev

"God can use you anywhere." That's what my good friend Cynthia keeps reminding me since I returned to the workforce last year. Sometimes I do believe she's right. But then there are other times when I question if God is actually using me there to bless others or trying to make me see the error of my past ways.

On the job, some of the young people call me "Mama Bev." Obviously they recognize that I am older and yes, I wear being a "boomer" "old school" proudly on my chest. At the same time, however, I am nurturing as I listen to them share their stories. In the year since I've been working, I have adopted dozens of new children---young people not much older than my own daughter---who have felt comfortable coming to me to share their joys, sorrows and drama. And trust me, they all have plenty of DRAMA!

I have seen the face of domestic violence in a young co-worker's eyes and have prayed with and for her. I've kept secrets of infidelity and even blushed at some of the stuff these young people tell me. I acknowledge their pain and struggles but also give them a "you need to get back up after you fall down" speech.

This week I had a young lady confide in me that she was pregnant. Now the mothering part of me thought she was about a month ago and I asked her point black but she denied it. I asked her if she and her boyfriend were happy about it. She told me they weren't ready for a baby financially and she didn't know what to do. And then she popped the question: "Miss Bev, will you take my baby and raise it as your own? I know you would be a great mom because you are so nurturing." WHAT?! Now you know I didn't hear that coming! Initially I thought she was joking until I saw the tears swell up in her eyes.

All kinds of random thoughts immediately went through my head.

Why ask me?
I'm almost 60 years old!
Why not ask her own mother?
What would Nate think?
I love the way newborn babies smell


I told her I had finished raising my child but I would do what I could to support her.

Sometimes being Mama Bev is a tough job.