Has the True Sentiment Gone Out of Mother's Day?

Mary Baldwin College alumna Anna Jarvis was the driving force behind the creation of Mother’s Day. But she would not be pleased at all with Mother’s Day as it is celebrated in 2009, according to a source at her alma mater.

“Miss Jarvis thought Mother’s Day should be a day you spend with your mother, or a day when you do something special for her like fix her dinner or repair her broken stairs,” says William Pollard, archivist at Mary Baldwin College in Staunton, VA. “It was not supposed to be a day where you buy her something.”

Pollard says Jarvis wanted to keep Mother’s Day non-commercial--a battle she knew she had lost by the time of her death in 1948.

To understand how the day became nationally celebrated it’s important to know a bit about Anna Jarvis. She was graduated from Augusta Female Seminary, which is now Mary Baldwin College, in 1883 and moved back home with her parents. In 1905, Anna’s mother passed away. After her mother’s death, Jarvis spent years sending letters to public officials urging them to set aside a day to honor mothers.

In 1914, that day came. President Woodrow Wilson, whose birthplace was just across the street from Mary Baldwin College, signed the proclamation formally establishing Mother’s Day.

Over the years, however, Anna Jarvis became bitter with the commercialization of Mother’s Day.

She has been quoted as saying: “Mother’s Day has nothing to do with candy. Candy is junk. You give your mother a box of candy and then go home and eat most of it yourself, or else you give her hard candy that breaks her teeth or dentures.”

“Flowers are about half-dead by the time they’re delivered,” said Jarvis. “It’s really a shame to waste flowers for Mother’s Day. Florists have made millions of dollars out of my idea and they don’t deserve it.”

So what do you think? What is the best way to honor our Mothers on Mother's Day?

Get Your Business Praise On

Today is Monday. For those of you who still work in Corporate America, it is the beginning of your work week. When I worked in Corporate America I struggled on Mondays because I knew I would have to put up with a lot of craziness including breaking news, ill-advised decisions and co-workers with bad attitudes.

So do you know what I would do? I would pop in my favorite gospel CD and get my praise on before I went into work. It was like a buffer between me and the evil forces of the newsroom.

Even though I'm now my own boss, I still live in the world and still have to deal with others. So let me share how I still get my OFFICE PRAISE on through prayer and meditation.


O - Oh Lord, help me not to OFFEND anybody today
F - FREEZE my tongue, if somebody says something out of the way
F - Fill me with Your grace, so that I might stay cool
I - I'm trying to do right, but I ain't nobody's fool
C - Cause me to humble myself, before I get fired
E - Even a saint like me sometimes gets tired

P - PRAISE your name, because You've saved me, many times before
R - RISE up in me before I get in the door
A - All Mighty One, You know I need you close
I - INSPIRE me to be kind, if not to all, to most....No...To ALL!!
S - SHOW me how to be an example of Your love, not hate
E - Even me Lord, I hope it's not too late

'Today I ask God to meet me at the office door, and sit with me all day'

Discipline and Grandchildren

While my daughter is away at college, I am the primary caregiver for her two-year-old son. This means I am responsible for everything involving his life---including discipline.

Just like my daughter did when she was little, my grandson constantly tests his boundries to see how much he can get away with. I am a firm believer that children need limits and boundaries. They also need to understand there are consequences for bad behavior.

The challenge lies in making sure parents and grandparents are on one accord when it comes to discipline. For example, if a parent does not believe in spanking and you, as a grandparent do believe in spanking, how do you handle that? I personally agree with an article I read on the grandparents.com website, which indicates the guardian who has home-field advantage has the rights over discipline.

So what do you say? Do grandparents have rights when it comes to discipline? Or should they simply adhere to the "time-out" policy and leave the real punishment to the parent(s)?

Parents, Sex and Their Kids

Drugs, Sex, Rock & Roll & Woodstock: Those are some of the tags associated with my baby boomer generation. Now, here we are 40 years later dealing with some of the same things with our own children and grandchildren. But what is so shocking is the fact that the kids engaging in these risky behaviors are getting younger and younger. Just this morning, I came across an article this morning that startled me.

The article indicates that middle school youth are engaging in sexual intercourse as early as age 12, according to a study by researchers at The University of Texas School of Public Health.

Results from this study are published in the April issue of Journal of School Health.

Researchers examined sexual risk behaviors among middle school students in a large southeastern U.S. urban public school district. The say the study shows that although most seventh graders are not engaging in sexual risk behaviors, a small percentage are putting themselves at risk.

In the study, sexual intercourse was defined as vaginal, oral or anal sex. According to their research, by age 12, 12 percent of students had already engaged in vaginal sex, 7.9 percent in oral sex, 6.5 percent in anal sex and 4 percent in all three types of intercourse.

Researchers say these findings are alarming because youth who start having sex before age 14 are much more likely to have multiple lifetime sexual partners, use alcohol or drugs before sex and have unprotected sex, all of which puts them at greater risk for getting a sexually transmitted disease (STD) or becoming pregnant.

The study found one-third of sexually active students reported engaging in vaginal or anal sex without a condom within the past three months, and one-fourth had four or more partners. The more experienced students in all three types of intercourse were more likely to be male and African-American.

So I ask you, parents and grandparents, who or what is the blame for this outrageous, risky behavior among our youth? What can be done to prevent it?

The Ten Commandments of Marriage from a Man's Point of View

**Special thanks to my MARRIED friend, Fred Marvin, for sharing this with me**


Commandment 1
Marriages are made in heaven. But so are thunder and lightning.

***********

Commandment 2
If you want your wife to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say; talk in your sleep.

***********

Commandment 3
Marriage is grand -- and divorce is at least 100 grand!

***********

Commandment 4
Married life is very frustrating. In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens. In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen.

***********

Commandment 5
When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing: Either the car is new or the wife is.

***********

Commandment 6
Marriage is when a man and woman become as one. The trouble starts when they try to decide which one.

***********


Commandment 7
Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you say. After marriage, he will fall asleep before you finish.

***********

Commandment 8
Every man wants a wife who is beautiful, understanding, economical, and a good cook. But the law allows only one wife.

***********

Commandment 9
Marriage and love are purely matter of chemistry. That is why wives treat husbands like toxic waste.

***********

Commandment 10
A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished.

**********

Bonus Commandment ( Story )

A long married couple came upon a wishing well. The husband leaned over, made a wish and threw in a penny. The wife decided to make a wish too. But she leaned over too much, fell into the well, and drowned.

The husband was stunned for a moment but then smiled, "It worked!"

Has Easter Lost it's True Meaning?

I couldn't wait to take my two-year-old grandson to church this morning for Easter because he looked so handsome in the outfit I bought for him. I was like that with my daughter and I remember my parents were the same with me.

But is that what Easter is all about---dressing up in your newly purchased colorful spring outfits and parading yourself in front of others in God's house?

As a baby boomer I believe Easter, just like Christmas, has lost its meaning over the years as we focus more on the materialism associated with it instead of the death and resurrection of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ.

Did you know the word “Easter” doesn’t have anything to do with the Christian celebration? It is derived from the name of a German deity, Estre or Ostra. She was the goddess of the rising sun and spring, and was celebrated in springtime festivals.

Did you also know that rabbits are an ancient pagan symbol? They represent fertility and are associated with the re-awakening of the land in springtime. Bunnies were first associated with Easter celebrations in the 1500s, and by the early 1800s, German bakers were selling Easter bunnies made from chocolate and pastry.

Eggs, which are laid by birds and from which new birds emerge, were symbols of new life and rebirth long before the Christian era began. In the early days of the church, the consumption of eggs during Lent was prohibited, so decorating them and giving them as gifts on Easter became a way of celebrating the resurrection.

The tradition of the Easter Bunny bringing gifts to children Easter morning is also from Germany, where he was known as Oschter Haws. Initially, the bunny left his treats in a nest made for him by children. Later, the tradition merged with the notion of the Easter basket.

So what do you think? Are we, as a society, obsessed with traditions that have no value?

Baby Boomer Parenting 101

Now that my baby has a baby, I am even more concerned about how I've raised her. You see, as a baby boomer mom and grandma, I now understand how much parenting, good or bad, can affect a child's life and that behavior gets passed down from generation to generation.

I bring this up because of a conversation my daughter and I had while traveling together last week. "Get into the Groove" by Madonna came on the radio. Immediately she said, "I remember you used to exercise to that song."

She was right. I used to pop in the Madonna Live tape, move the living room furniture and get my fitness groove on. I have to admit I was shocked she remembered because she couldn't have been more than 3 years old at the time. Madonna's song opened the door for other mother-daughter memories. This was her opportunity to tell me what she didn't like about me.

I learned she absolutely hated all of the times I used to visit and/or volunteer at her school. I was there so much, she said, many of her fellow students thought I worked there. She also hated how I grilled her friends about their grades, goals and yes, their parents.

Here's the point: What we say and do in front of our children and grandchildren will have a lasting impact---whether we want to believe it or not.

It may be too late to right the wrongs with your children but you can still make a positive difference with your grandchildren.

I figure it this way: If my grandson gets the benefit of seeing his mom exercise to a Beyonce video, while keeping a guarded eye on who he's hanging out with and grimacing over her taking an active role in his education, then my actions as her mother haven't been that bad after all.