Bill Parcells: Show Some Respect for Menopausal Women

Former Dallas Cowboys Coach Bill Parcells is going through what he calls “male menopause. In a recent article written by sports writer Michael David Smith, Parcells is quoted as saying: "I've quit being ashamed of what I am. I'm a guy who loves football. ... You call it, maybe, a male menopause, when you realize you're no longer ashamed of what you are. ...”

For my menopausal sisters who don’t know who Bill Parcells is---all you need to know is he’s the football coach who couldn’t get it up enough to motivate his former Cowboys to the level they are now. Now he’s apparently headed to Miami to put together a Super Bowl caliber Team for Miami Dolphins fans. But he says "I don't want thugs and hoodlums on the team…"

My question to you Bill is, do you think all women were ashamed of themselves BEFORE they entered into menopause? Also, you say you don’t want thugs and hoodlums on your team----but are you aware that a woman in menopause would have absolutely no problem handling the type of people you refer to?!

If your hormones are out of whack, why not try Viagra and leave the menopause theory alone.

To read the complete article:

http://sports.aol.com/fanhouse/2007/12/27/bill-parcells-on-building-dolphins-roster-i-dont-want-thugs-a/1#c9524730

Top Baby Boomer Divas of 2007

Who better than me---the self-proclaimed Baby Boomer Diva---to come up with a list of the Top Baby Boomer Divas of 2007?

I have to admit, it was a CHALLENGE because there are so many fabulous women out here who are 40 plus. I did have some input from some of the members of the baby Boomer Dva Web of Fame, so without further ado here are our picks:


Boomer Diva TV Anchor:
Monica (Kaufman) Pearson of WSB-TV Atlanta, GA

Boomer Diva Making A Difference:
Caroline Kennedy & Bonnie Price (tie):

Best Boomer Diva Chef:
Paula Deen

Best Diva Actress in an Animated Role:
Nancy Cartwright

Favorite Diva Movie Actress & Entrepreneur:
Diane Keaton.

Best “Diva” on TV:
Vanessa L. Williams.

Fitness Diva:
Denise Austin & Donna Richardson (tie).

Best Looking Boomer Diva Model:
Iman

Comeback TV Boomer Diva Actress of the Year:
Sally Field

Comeback Boomer Entertainer of the Year:
Bette Midler

A special “Enjoy Your Menopause” Award is given to: Patti LaBelle because she demonstrates that you can still be classy and loaded with unstoppable talent while going through “the change.”

To see the entire group and read why they were chosen, please visit my website:
www.thebabyboomerdiva.com

Baby Boomer Celebrity Gets “Hot” on TV

R&B Singer Patti LaBelle is going through menopause and she let all of America know it during her appearance on Thursday night’s finale of NBC’s “Clash of the Choirs.” When asked what she thought of the dueling choirs, the first words out of Patti’s mouth were “Honey, I’m in menopause!” She went on to say the sweat pouring down her face at times was a combination of hot flashes and feeling the spirit.

Patti “Baby Boomer Diva” LaBelle gets my vote for demonstrating that you can still be classy even when you get a little hot under the collar. If she had never mentioned the “M” word, you certainly wouldn’t have been able to tell by the way she sang with her hand-picked amateur choir. Menopause or not, Patti never seems to let it get in the way of her powerful singing ability.

Nick Lachey’s choir may have been declared the champions on the NBC Special but Patti LaBelle is the true champion for menopausal women everywhere. Thank you Patti and welcome to the Baby Boomer Diva Web of Fame.

Let the Baby Boomer Without Sin Cast the First Stone

Will somebody please tell me what’s the big deal about Barack Obama using drugs when he was a teenager? Wasn’t that like 25-30 years ago?

The latest political news has a Clinton advisor resigning because of the controversial remarks he made about Obama and his drug use. William Shaheen reportedly suggested that Democrats give more thought to Sen. Barack Obama's admissions of illegal drug use before they pick a presidential candidate.

OK...so somebody help me here.

Obama has been free about discussing his drug use as a young man. In his 1995 memoir, Dreams From My Father, written shortly after he graduated from Harvard Law School, he wrote that during his difficult late teens "Pot had helped, and booze; maybe a little blow when you could afford it. Not smack, though."

I could understand it if the Democratic presidential candidate was still a pothead or doing it on the down low but Obama saw the light; he came to realize the error of his ways and decided to straighten up and fly right. Fortunately, he was given a chance to do so because many young black men aren’t given that second chance. They either wind up behind bars or six feet under.

For those baby boomers who can’t handle the truth or want to claim they are holier than thou, go ahead and throw your stones. I just hope you don’t live in a glass house.

One more thing: This is NOT a political endorsement for Obama---

Hot Fun in the Winter Time!

Not only is this baby boomer living in a "dry state" (with no signs of water relief in site) but she is also walking around in flip flops and shorts in the middle of what's supposed to be known as Winter.

It was almost 80 degrees here in North Carolina today! It's two weeks before Christmas and no sign of a winter wonderland. What's a poor baby boomer like me to do? Suck it up and enjoy it, I guess.

Baby Boomers aren't supposed to like the cold anyway, right? It's bad for our arthritis. Lord knows, we don't know how to drive in the rain so just imagine what it would be like to have us on the road when there's snow AND ice. Another thing: what could be worse than looking at a baby boomer with dried up, wrinkled and cracked skin?

You know what, I really don't have anything else to say because I feel a hot flash coming on and it's not caused by global warming.

We're in a Serious Drought!

52 is the number of days officials in Durham, NC say is left before we run out of "easily accessible premium water." This was the information I read in my morning newspaper.

I knew we were having some drought issues but I didn't realize we are really down to the wire now! We've had some sporadic periods of rain but NOTHING in comparison to the torrential downpours other parts of the country has seen. As a matter of fact, I don't think we've had a decent amount of rain in over a year.

Our primary source of water comes from Lake Michie. When I drove past the lake a couple of months ago, it looked more like a dried up swamp but I guess it just didn't register with me. City officials say they have a temporary solution which is to connection 500 million gallons in the quarry to its main water supply. They estimate that would add another 25 days to the overall supply.

I guess that means I'll have to stop watering my well-kept lawn and washing my brand new car. I guess I could put laundry aside for a week instead of washing every other day and there's no reason to run the dishwater when I can wash by hand once a week. If push comes to shove, I may only "flush" twice a day instead of the current 20 flushes.

But.....giving up the 45 minute shower may cause this "baby boomer in menopause" to have to go to jail on principle.

A Family Affair: Baby Boomer Style

One of the things my husband and I talked about when we were dating (a few years ago) was the fact that we were going to put ourselves in a position of being financially independent. We weren’t going to rely on Corporate America to take care of us into retirement.

We are two intelligent and highly motivated individuals who still have dreams and passions at midlife. When circumstances forced me to give up my television news job last year, my husband stepped up and became the wind beneath my wings. He helped me soar to my greatest heights on a new career path and, sometimes, had to guide me back in the right direction when I was steering off course.

He now understands why I spend so many hours on the computer doing research and answering emails and promoting what I do. He’s finally figuring out the fact that menopause pays benefits and so does “all things baby boomer.”

But more importantly, he is pursuing his own midlife passions with a goal to be healthy and fit for as long as possible. www.healthylivingboomerstyle.com

Please join me in welcoming my better baby boomer half into cyberspace. Also check out his blog: www.healthylivingboomerstyle.blogspot.com

You’re going to be hearing A LOT from us!

When children lose someone they care about

The day after Thanksgiving the grandmother of my daughter’s best friend passed away. It was expected, but as with any death where illness is involved, family and friends are always hopeful that the end will come later instead of sooner.

I watched in awe as my teenage daughter became a pillar of strength for her friend who was obviously very close to her grandmother. From the moment the decision was made to take her off of the respirator, my daughter stepped up to offer comfort to her friend in the best way she could. She went to the hospital and maintained a vigil with the family. She left---only to return again at midnight---when she learned of her passing.

Just last month I found myself in the same situation when I lost a dear friend. It was if my daughter had watched my every move because she was doing what I had done.

It is expected that baby boomers, like me, will lose older family members and friends as time goes by but when children lose people they care about, it can be a hard concept to truly understand. Hopefully, parents are teaching their children to love, appreciate and respect their aging family members while they’re alive so that when they’re gone, they will have cherished memories to hold on to.

Thanksgiving in the E.R.

Instead of watching E.R. on TV on Thursday night, the scenes played out in real life as my husband and I spent more than six hours in the Duke Medical Center emergency room on Thanksgiving night with my mother-in-law.

To give you a little background: my mother-in-law is in the latter stages of Alzheimers. We moved her from her home in South Carolina to a home care facility close to us in NC so we could look after her better.

The night before Thanksgiving, she apparently fell and sprained her left arm while wandering in the middle of the night. She was taken to the E.R. where a cast was placed on her arm. On Thanksgiving Day, her son picked her up so she could spend part of the day with us and have dinner.

While I was distracted with completing dinner, my mother-in-law decided to remove the cast from her arm. This resulted in major swelling and since no one knew how to put the cast back on without having a major fight on our hands, we figured the best thing to do was to take her back the E.R. to have them do it.

I thought we would be out in an hour max because how long does it take to replace an arm cast? Well, it actually took more than six hours because cases kept coming in that became priority over her:

Case #1: Young man shot in the abdomen while sitting on his front porch. Suspects unknown.

Case #2: Two-year-old sticks popcorn kernel up his nose and required emergency surgery to remove it.

Case #3: DUI driver runs a red light and hits a car full of people who were returning home after visiting family for Thanksgiving.

Case #4: Young pregnant woman has too much to drink and goes into some kind of seizure.

I don’t know if it’s just Duke’s E.R. but their customer service was absolutely HORRIBLE!!! I don’t even want to think about the kind of treatment we could’ve received if we didn’t have insurance.

It was an interesting night and one that kept me from missing the traditional Black Friday shopping spree because I couldn’t get out of bed. I'm also beginning to understand the role many baby boomers, like myself, are going to have to play when it comes to dealing with aging parents.

Sesame Street For Adults Only?

Movies like Debbie Does Dallas have a warning label because they're x-rated but a warning label on a Sesame Street DVD? Are you kidding?

According to an article written by Virginia Heffernan in the NY Times magazine, there is a warning on Volumes 1 and 2, “Sesame Street: Old School” indicating the videos are for adults-only: “These early ‘Sesame Street’ episodes are intended for grown-ups, and may not suit the needs of today’s preschool child.”

Sesame Street wasn't around for my baby boomer generation but my daughter grew up watching it. Sesame Street taught her about respect, the importance of learning and what it meant to be a good neighbor and better friend. It was OK to ask for an adult stranger's help and not worry about being abducted or abused. Who cared if Oscar the Grouch was always grumpy or if Cookie Monster ate too much junk food?

How sad to think the old Sesame Street neighborhood has become a victim of urban renewal.


"Come and play! Everything's A-OK.
Friendly neighbors there, that's where we meet.
Can you tell me how to get, how to get to Sesame Street?"

I'm Baby Boomer 305.24

It seems like our lives are identified by numbers. We have a social security number, driver’s license number and credit card numbers. We even have to have a number to identify the size of our clothes and shoes. Some of us have an incarceration number which, like your driver’s and social security numbers, will never go away.

But I learned recently that I have another number to add to my list. That number identifies me at my public library. That’s right. My book, Whatever! A Baby Boomer’s Journey Into Middle Age is in my local library! It sits right on the shelf alongside the autobiographies of former Secretary of State Colin Powell and Fox News Anchor Bill O’Reilly, to name a few.

It’s truly an honor to see my book sitting in a place with millions of other books. I worked hard on my book and even lost my job over it. Unlike other baby boomer authors, some who got wonderful five and six figure publishing deals, no one wanted to invest in me---so I had to invest in myself (or should I say my husband did). I still don’t have a distributor but it didn’t stop me from getting my book on amazon.com and barnesandnoble.com. Last week, my book reached the Top 100 on Amazon in the Aging category. That’s quite an accomplishment from someone whose advertising budget came more from her drive and determination instead of her pocketbook.

Even with all of the numbers I have to try to remember, I don’t mind being baby boomer 305.24. I do have a problem with my dress size though and I’m definitely working to change it!

Cosmetic Surgery and African-American Baby Boomers

Even though there is no “official” word on the cause of death for the mother of Hip Hop Rap Star Kanye West, there are plenty of rumors flying around that she died as the result of some complications connected to cosmetic surgery. Unsubstantiated reports indicate 58-year-old Dr. Donda West went into the hospital for a breast reduction and tummy tuck. According to CNN reports, A Beverly Hills plastic surgeon said he consulted with West several months earlier but refused to perform the procedure without a medical clearance. In a statement released through his publicist, Dr. Andre Aboolian said, "I always insist on a medical clearance for women over 40, and in this instance it was particularly important because of a condition she had that I felt could have led to a heart attack." It is believed West suffered from hypertension.

Undoubtedly there will be many questions raised about the doctor who actually performed the procedure. Did he get a medical clearance? If not, why? Was he aware of any pre-existing conditions? If so, how influential was the patient in getting him to ignore them?

West is among an increasingly growing number of baby boomers who have chosen plastic surgery as an option to either enhance their appearance or minimize the signs of aging. What is even more interesting is the fact that more and more minorities are choosing the procedure. According to the American Society of Plastic Surgeons, Hispanics lead the way with the number cosmetic procedures. Statistics from 2005 indicated more than 900,000 Hispanics had some type of plastic surgery. That’s nearly a million people. African-Americans weren’t far behind with more than 760,000. Overall, there were nearly 2.3 million procedures performed---which represents an increase of 65 percent from 2004.

The death of Dr. West will re-ignite the debate over whether cosmetic surgery is necessary. I can’t help but think how sad it is that we have become a society so obsessed with appearance. And shame on the so-called professionals obsessed with making the all mighty dollar all in the name of beauty. Whatever happened to “I love you just the way you are.”

Meet the Bloggers from the Hallmark Conference

After I accepted the invitation for the all-expenses paid trip to the Hallmark Bloggers Conference in Kansas City, I learned I would be one of about a half dozen bloggers from around the country attending.

I kept thinking to myself, “How did they find me?” It was the SAME REACTION I had when I was interviewed for the New York Times. My Publicist says I’m more popular than I think I am. Well, if that’s the case, why haven’t I sold a million books yet?

WHATEVER!

Anyway, my first contact with the others came on the morning of the conference. (I got in too late to try to socialize the night before). I wasn’t surprised that I was the only African-American but I was a little surprised at the make-up of the group. Four of us were Baby Boomers and the other three were Echo Boomers I guess (all under the age of 30).

The person I recognized right away was Dotsie Bregal for the NABBW. She looks just like her picture on my Baby Boomer Diva Web of Fame.

The person I seemed to gravitate towards almost immediately was Jerry Stearns. Jerry has a blog called: yourlifeafter50.com I learned that Jerry was from Fargo, ND. He’s the first person I’ve ever met from there. He’s married with children and he’s not someone who sends cards just because---but what man really does? I liked Jerry. He wasn’t pretentious and I learned during lunch that he had a softer, gentler side.

Jennette Fulda is apparently known as the PastaQueen. Why I don’t remember. I must have been having a menopausal moment when she was talking. But to tell you the truth, she was the quiet one in the group---so quiet that I hardly knew she was there unless she was right in my face. I recall her saying she lost quite a bit of weight---50 pounds or more I think. She was from Indianapolis.

The “Valley Girl” in the group was Stephanie Quilao. Her website is: www.backinskinnyjeans.com Stephanie was proud to proclaim that she lost 25 pounds so far and she wanted Hallmark to offer cards of encouragement for people who were fighting the battle of the bulge. She was spunky and pleasant to be around and quite knowledgeable about the blogging world.

Elizabeth Thielke hailed from Nashville. She is the author of three websites. I like the www.busymom.net one the best. Her genbetween.com website is quite informative. I learned that Liz and I shared a few things in common. We’re both only children and taking care of our elderly parents. Her mother has Alzheimer’s---so does my mother-in-law.

Last but not least was Sylvia Hall. She was the only “local” person in the group. Sylvia loves to write and dreams of getting a Hallmark gig someday. In her “other” life, she’s a teacher. I learned that we also share something in common: we both write for www.passionateforlife.com

I visited her blog: www.sylvias-journal.blogspot.com. She’s very colorful with words and is obviously very passionate about her writing.

I’m glad I got a chance to meet these bloggers because, otherwise, I would’ve probably never interacted with them in cyberspace.

My picks would’ve been different because it would’ve been based on who I’ve already been in contact with and interact with the most:

Mark: GoingLikeSixty.com
Rhea: thegeminiweb.com
Shirley: fabulousafterfifty.blogspot.com
Eileen: feistysideoffifty.com
Carine: whats-cooking.blogspot.com
Sharon: babyboomeradvisorclub.wordpress.com
Angela: angelabetts.com
A representative from womensvoicesforchange.org
And Me, of course!

If you want to see the bloggers go to, www.enjoyyourmenopause.com/hallmark_bloggers.html

Then check out the blog contest and add your name to the winners list, like Karen O'Bannon from Louisville, KY. http://www.enjoyyourmenopause.com/hallmark_contest.html

When You Care Enough to Send For the Very Best

Hallmark Cards put its famous slogan into action this past Thursday when the Company invited seven (7) bloggers from around the country to attend the First Bloggers Conference.

“I” was one of the Super Seven chosen for this trailblazing event. Joining me were Stephanie Quilao, California; Elizabeth Thielke, Tennessee; Jerry Stearns, North Dakota; Dotsie Bregal, MD; Jeanette Fulda, IN and Sylvia Hall, MO. I’ll be telling you more about them and my impressions of them in a future blog.

How were we selected? Thru our blogging. That’s right! Hallmark Executives invited us to the one-day conference to get some feedback from those of us in the “cyberspace media.” We were selected for two reasons:

1) We have a visible online presence.
2) We’re writing about subject they’re interested in and we’re doing it in a non-offensive way.

Since I have several blogs, I was curious as to which one caught their eye. I would’ve guessed Boomerworld but they noticed Baby Boomer Talk & Other Stuff.

As a result, they rolled out the red carpet and gave us royal treatment. (Of course, being a Diva, I expected nothing less).

To try to tell you about the whole experience in one post is impossible so I’m going to break it up into a few posts over the coming days.

I want to thank all of you who gave me your thoughts and ideas to share. You’ll be happy to know I did exactly what you asked.

For those of you who want to know about the travel experience and what airline NOT to fly, please visit my other blog: http://www.boomerworld.blogspot.com

For those of you who want to participate in my “What Happened in Kansas City DOESN’T STAY in Kansas City” contest, click here: Contest. The first correct answer will win and receive some complimentary Hallmark Cards that you can give to your family and friends. (Bloggers who attended the conference are not eligible to participate---nor are any Hallmark employees).

Next time I'll introduce you to the bloggers.

Who Stole My Body?

That’s the question I’ve been asking myself for a few years now. Everyday I look in the mirror and wonder what happened to that drop dead, gorgeous size 3 figure that used to turn heads and stop men dead in their tracks. I’m turning heads these days but not in quite the same way.

Middle-age spread is one issue I never thought I’d have to deal with, but honey, let me tell you, it’s no joke! My middle-aged, baby boomer years have resulted in some spreading, sagging and cellulite---while my breasts, belly and lap are getting better acquainted. My gynecologist says the weight gain is a result of my metabolism slowing down and MENOPAUSE.

I am convinced there is a thief on the loose who is running around attacked middle-aged women. I would have felt much better about the burglary had he taken my Hot Flashes too!

See what I mean by checking out my You Tube video: http://www.youtube.com/babyboomerbev

The "Terrible Ten" List

Being a baby boomer in the workplace can be very challenging. Why? Well, for one reason you have young-know-it-alls who come in and immediately get promoted over you. Then you have younger bosses who want to belittle you because you don't have the up-to-date technical skills they feel is necessary in order to do the same job you've been doing efficiently without them. Then you have downright DISCRIMINATION based on age, sex or race.

What gets on your last nerve when it comes to your workplace environment? What makes your skin crawl when dealing with the general public?

Johns Hopkins University teamed up with the University of Baltimore to find out what people thought about rude behavior and came up with a “Terrible Ten” List. 615 people were surveyed. See if your list matches theirs.

The complete list of "Terrible Ten" behaviors:

1. Discrimination in an employment situation.
2. Erratic/aggressive driving that endangers others.
3. Taking credit for someone else’s work.
4. Treating service providers as inferiors.
5. Jokes or remarks that mock another’s race/gender/age/disability/sexual preference or religion.
6. Children who behave aggressively or who bully others.
7. Littering (including trash, spitting, pet waste).
8. Misuse of handicapped privileges.
9. Smoking in non-smoking places or smoking in front of non-smokers without asking.
10. Using cell phones or text messaging in mid-conversation or during an appointment or meeting.

You see, this is EXACTLY why I’m so glad I work for myself these days!!!

What irks you?

Baby Boomers on the Move in Maryland

In addition to being the state where African-American baby boomers make the most money, Maryland now holds the distinguished honor of being the state where the first baby boomer has applied for social security.

61-year-old Kathleen Casey-Kirschling applied for the benefits on Monday. She will be eligible to receive her monthly checks in January 2008 after she turns 62. Casey-Kirschling is one of about 80 million baby boomers who will qualify for social security in the coming years.

Meanwhile, Social Security Commissioner Michael Astrue says an estimated 10,000 baby boomers a day will become eligible for Social Security benefits over the next two decades, and the Social Security Trust Fund is projected to go broke in 2041.

So whose fault is this? Are politicians to blame for using social security money to fund unnecessary pork barrel funding projects? What about Corporate America Executives who mismanaged retirement funds? Or what about the wealthiest among us who have failed to pay their fair portion in taxes? My mother calls it “robbing Peter to pay Paul.” Whatever you want to call it, the social security tidal wave is going to hit and it’s going to hit HARD.

We baby boomers put the MOST into the system, so we should get the MOST out of it.

When asked about social security, the nation’s first recognized baby boomer said, “I think I’m just lucky to be at the top of the boom. I am blessed to have been in this generation and really blessed to take my Social Security now.” Casey-Kirschling encourages people to collect retirement benefits whenever they are eligible to take them.

I’ll only be 84 by the time the social security trust fund goes belly up so I think I’ll be in Maryland where the wealthiest among us live.

Aging, Depression and Heart Disease

There may be a link between depression and heart disease according to a study conducted by researchers at Ohio State University. The findings suggest that chronic depression may play a key role in starting the cascade that can lead to the buildup of plaques clogging coronary arteries.

Researchers have apparently connected an increase in two immune system proteins essential for inflammation to a latent viral infection and proposed a chain of events that might accelerate cardiovascular disease.

Ronald Glaser, a professor of molecular virology, immunology and medical genetics at Ohio State University, said, “To me, this suggests a new way of thinking about how these diseases develop. We carry around these latent herpes viruses in our bodies virtually all our lives and periodically they can hurt us, inducing biological events that could lead to an increased risk of atherosclerosis.”

Glaser, head of Ohio State’s Institute for Behavioral Medicine Research, has focused for years on Epstein-Barr virus (EBV), one of eight different herpes viruses that can remain dormant in the body for a lifetime.

“Perhaps more than 90 percent of the people in North America have been infected by EBV by the time they’re adults,” Glaser said. “Virtually everybody in the country is carrying this virus.”

Increased stress and depression, coupled with aging, can also trigger the latent virus to reactivate and begin reproducing inside cells.

“People need to remember how important depression is, and that when they’re depressed, it can reactivate these viruses, starting the cascade that leads to inflammation, perhaps increasing the risk of cardiovascular disease, according to Glaser.

“So treating depression is very important,” he said.

The next time a doctor tries to tell you “It’s all in your head,” be sure to ask the physician what impact that could have on your heart.

Wakin' Up with Whoopi!

This baby boomer diva woke up with Whoopi on Monday. I normally switch between Whoopi and the Tom Joyner Morning Show but on this particular day, I was cruisin’ down the highway with Whoopi, Cubby and the rest of the crew. It was around 7am and I was beginning a four-hour road trip to Columbia, South Carolina for a television interview.

Suddenly, I heard newest host of The View invite listeners to call in and ask any questions they had for her guest psychic, Joan Marie Whelan. Of course, you know I had to call in. I mean, what else did I have to do for the next four hours other than listen to the radio and talk on my cell phone?

I don’t know if I was more surprised that I got through right away----or by the answers the psychic gave me to my questions.

Now I have to tell you right up front that I don’t believe in psychics---but I do believe dreams can come true!

Give a listen: http://www.whoopi.com/audio.html

Click on hour #3

Baby Boomer Message: "Show us you know us!"

Hallmark has become the latest major retailer to stand up and take notice of the demographic with the most spending power. The company is launching a new line of greeting cards called Journeys. These cards are supposed to be designed with baby boomers in mind. Their slogan is: New cards with real words for real life.

Does this mean Hallmark has finally figured out that like isn’t hunky dory all the time and that we, as baby boomers, may want to express our sentiments about issues like divorce, depression, job loss, aging parents, etc with empowering messages of hope and encouragement? All they would have to do is read my book Whatever! A Baby Boomer's Journey Into Middle Age and know that we go through many journeys as we age. Another thing--Has Hallmark finally realized that baby boomer women love to buy cards and will buy them for any and every occasion?

The Maxine Cards, introduced by Hallmark, do serve some purpose but I don't think the vast majority of baby boomer women want to be depicted with that image. Some of us as classy divas and should have cards representing OUR IMAGE.

I have been invited to visit the Hallmark Headquarters next month to take a sneak peak at the new card lineup and to offer feedback and input. Am I going? Absolutely! And I’m taking you with me. Well, not literally. But I will take your ideas if you want to share them.

Hallmark now joins Ann Taylor in making an effort to reach out and show us that they really do know us.

Why Black Women Don't Exercise

It’s a HAIR thing!

That’s right. Our hair keeps us from working out at a pace and level we should be in order to shed those unwanted pounds.

Let me break it down for you. Yesterday, I spent close to a $100 (including tip) getting my hair to look like a Baby Boomer Diva hairstyle should look. Now, if I turn around and exercise in the next 24 hours like I know I should, I will have wasted my money. The body perspiration will sweat the curls right out of my head and I will end up having to spend even more money to restore my hair back to its Beauty Salon Look. I need to keep my hairdo for at least a week. In the meantime, I’ll just cut back on my food intake---which means I’ll eat like a bird---until I decide it's OK to hit the gym once again. Blame it on menopause or whatever! but my body has just got to understand that sacrifices must be made for MY HAIR.

The number one reason African-American women DON’T EXERCISE on a consistent basis is because we don’t want to mess up our hair. If you don’t believe me, just ask my hairdresser.

Registration Underway for the “Ain’t No Stoppin’ Us Now!” Girlfriends’ Retreat

It’s being dubbed as the most exciting weekend gathering of baby boomer women on the planet! Women from around the country are expected to converge on Daytona Beach, Florida March 28-30 2008 for the “Ain’t No Stoppin’ Us Now!” Baby Boomer Girlfriends’ Weekend Retreat. The event, sponsored by BAM Enterprises and Fabulously40.com, is being hosted by the “Diva” of all baby boomers, Beverly Mahone.

“Mature Girls STILL wanna have fun”, says Mahone, “so that’s why this trail-blazing, fun-filled, weekend was created. We want to offer mature women a total empowerment experience because sometimes life can be pretty overwhelming.” Mahone adds that boomer women have grown a lot over the years and have taken on some major responsibilities including: careers, husbands, children---and some of them are even taking care of their own parents in their aging years.

The weekend will include interactive workshops, mini-spas, dance and karaoke contests and the most creative Over 40 Pa-jamming Party, Mahone says, anyone has ever witnessed. A local PBS Station will also be taping a Town Hall Meeting which Mahone will be hosting. The baby boomer author of Whatever! A Baby Boomer's Journey Into Middle Age says, "Every now and then we deserve to have some ME TIME. That's what this Girlfriends Retreat is all about. It's a 'Pamper Me...Spoil Me...Because I Deserve It!' weekend affair”.

For more information on the Girlfriends Retreat and to register, go to: http://www.enjoyyourmenopause.com

Can Ann Taylor Save the Day?

In a recent article by the New York Times, it was announced that Ann Taylor is going to take a stab at designing a clothing line specifically for baby boomer women. That would be for women like ME.

Forth & Towne (a division of Gap, Inc.) tried it a couple of years ago but failed miserably. It was hard for me to associate the Gap with anything but jeans that I could NEVER fit.

I don't understand what's so hard about coming up with a clothing line for boomer women. No, we're not trying to let it all hang out anymore but we're also not ready to be sent into the convent. We have come into our own and the clothes we wear should reflect that. We're classy, some of us are a little sassy and we're sophisticated. If we're in the boardroom, there's a certain type of look we should have with clothing material that won't have us sweating like pigs during a hot flash.

We are not a "one-size/one-style fits all" generation; therefore the clothes should reflect that fact. What may be appealing to a 60-year-old boomer may be way off the mark when it comes to trying to dress a 45-year-old. Keep that in mind, Ms. Taylor.

The New York Times also indicated Boomers spend $43 billion a year on apparel. So it would stand to reason that if Ann Taylor gets it right, she will be handsomely rewarded by the millions of baby boomer women who are eager to look good from head to toe....especially those of us who are Divas.

Baby Boomers ARE Enjoying Sex!

I’ve been saying it all along and now a national survey of sexual attitudes, behaviors and problems among older adults in the United States confirms it. Data from the University of Chicago's National Social Life, Health and Aging Project (NSHAP), presented in the August 23, 2007, issue of the New England Journal of Medicine, showed that many men and women remain sexually active—participating in vaginal intercourse, oral sex and masturbation—well into their 70s and 80s.

Now this is the kind of survey I can appreciate. Surely I didn’t think my baby boomer husband and his menopausal wife were in the very small minority of couples who are enjoying a healthy and active sex life.

Today’s report also concluded that sexual activity was closely tied to overall health, which makes perfect sense. Older adults who actively exercise and eat healthy have more energy to spare for things like foreplay and sex.

My thanks goes out to the University of Chicago's National Social Life, Health and Aging Project for conducting such a survey and reminding baby boomers like myself that sometimes all you need is some candlelight, a Luther Vandross CD, a Vitamin E capsule and the right attitude for a “Let’s Get it On” kind of night.

To read the entire report: cut and paste this URL in your browser:

http://www.newswise.com:80/articles/view/532575/?sc=dwhn

Menopause Can Make You Fat...Duh!

Just yesterday I read an article indicating women were having less sex due to menopause. It’s a theory I dispute based on my own personal experience but, nonetheless, it was an interesting article. Today, another article has come out indicating that menopause can make you FAT. “The declining estrogen levels associated with the change can interfere with metabolic processes leading to weight gain,” US researchers said on Monday, confirming what many women already knew.

Yes, I am in the category of women who already knew this information. My wonderful gynecologist gave me the 4-1-1 on perimenopause and menopause a few years back just as I was beginning to experience some of the symptoms. She is one of the main reasons I have become knowledgeable on the subject. She is also one of the inspirations behind my book, Whatever! A Baby Boomer’s Journey Into Middle Age, in which I discuss my whole menopause experience and non-medical ways to deal with those annoying symptoms.

What the article doesn’t address are factors like stress and eating habits that also play a significant role in weight gain and menopause. The article also doesn’t talk about what needs to be done to give your metabolism a much needed jump start. We, as women, are led to believe that a 30-minute walk three times a week will help us maintain our weight but what needs to be done to DROP the fat? That’s what I talk about in my book. Are there really that many uninformed menopausal women out here who don’t have a clue about what’s going on with their bodies? Or is it possible there are too many doctors failing to provide the necessary treatment and information to their patients?

Next question, how much did these researchers get paid to supply this information? Could it be I’m in the wrong business?

Here’s the link to read the entire article:http://www.ebiologynews.com/2696.html

Less Sex in Menopause? Whatever!

A new poll released recently indicates more than half of menopausal women are settling for less sex. Apparently, about a thousand women were surveyed for the study. I don’t know how many women are currently in some phase of menopause but I would guess it’s at least a million. If that’s the case, 1000 women is a very small fraction of the female menopausal population. I might be inclined to believe the survey if the number of women surveyed were significantly higher.

One thing I didn’t see addressed in the survey is what the women had to say about their relationships with their mates. That is a key piece of information because if there isn’t a lot of happiness and support on the homefront, there definitely won’t be anything to sing about in the bedroom. Another thing, what are their stress levels or other midlife drama issues that may be affecting their low sex drive?

I wish someone had asked for my opinion. I would’ve been more than happy to tell them. Personally, I'm not having any problems. My husband makes me hotter than a hot flash! Yes, I do experience vaginal dryness from time to time but I know there are remedies for that. I’ve also learned over the years is sex and intimacy begin in the mind so if you convince yourself that you're not interested, over time you won't be.

Hot Flashes and NO Air Conditioning

What do you do when you have a hot flash and NO air conditioning? I certainly hope I don’t have to find out because the police may have to pay a visit to my home. I’ve been pretty fortunate lately. I haven’t had a hot flash in awhile. I attribute that to the strenuous exercise I’ve been doing. I figure if I sweat hard enough, I can sweat away a hot flash. Whatever! Right?

Yesterday, the air conditioner went on the blink. It just stopped working for no reason at all. Here we are in the midst of a heat wave and it decides it wants to act up! Even my dear, sweet husband---who ALWAYS complains about how COLD it is in the house—was feeling the heat. I went outside to have a talk with the thing. I asked it did it not care that I was a woman in menopause and I could flip out at any moment and throw it down the embankment next to my home. I could also go on a rampage in my neighborhood forcing my unsuspecting neighbors to call 9-1-1 to have me committed.

But then I thought about the sermon my pastor preached earlier that morning. He said if we have a strong foundation we would always be able to find peace in the midst of our storms. OK…That made sense. It’s how you handle the trials and tribulations that come your way. Getting upset over no air conditioning would only make me hotter and madder and probably raise my blood pressure. Besides, if it got really bad, I’m sure one of my nice neighbors would invite me to come into their nice, cool homes to cool down. Focusing my attention on other things---like finding a good scripture to meditate on---or picking up one of the many books I’ve finished yet also helps.

OK so although I have no air conditioning at the moment, I haven’t had a hot flash either so I’m alright.

Thank God for my strong foundation because, otherwise, I’d be blogging from prison.

Fellow Baby Boomers: What Message am I Missing?

OK, I decided to brave the heat this morning and take another trip to the Duke Trail. For those of you who don’t know, this is the place where the REAL exercise warriors go. It’s a rugged three-plus mile course, complete with it’s version of Heartbreak Hill. Trust me, by the time you make it up that hill, SOMETHING IS DEFINITELY BROKEN!!!

Anyway, just as I was preparing for my workout, here comes a fellow baby boomer looking like she just came from a make-up session at Nordstrom’s. AND it was the SAME WOMAN I saw on the trail earlier this week. Her face was completely done up in make-up again! She smiled as our eyes met. She looked beautiful with her matching outfit and there wasn’t one drop of sweat anywhere that I could see. I wanted to ask her what was the deal with the face-paint but just kept on walking.

Is there a new trend among baby boomer women that has us working out looking our best from head to toe? I had a similar encounter when I went to the gym yesterday. A fellow boomer was also wearing make-up and was completely color coordinated right down to her tennis shoes. Are my beat up shorts and non-matching T-shirt no longer acceptable? Oh, and let’s not even talk about my hair. If you saw me, you’d think I had just been in a fight!

Well, I don’t know what’s going on with some of these blooming boomers but I can tell you one thing for sure, it’ll be a cold day in hell before you see me walking that trail in make-up....but I will try to dress a little better though :)

Too Much Cardio Can Make You FAT!

OK…so now I know what my problem is. I’ve been exercising TOO MUCH! I went to the gym this morning and saw a big sign hanging on the wall that read, “Did you know too much cardio can make you fat?”

Well, golly gee---I didn’t know that at all. And here I thought I was doing my middle-aged body some good by burning off all of those excess calories. My gynecologist told me my metabolism started slowing down at 30. I figure at 50 it barely moves so a good shot of daily cardio would be just what the doctor ordered. But not so, according to gym employees who are apparently inspired by the increasing numbers of out of shape, downright fat baby boomers who keep walking through their doors.

The sign went on to inform me how I could learn more about getting rid of excess fat by signing up for a personal trainer. Oh! So that was the catch. It’s not enough that they have all of these machines in the gym to workout on. They want me to spend even MORE MONEY to hire a personal trainer to keep me from exercising so much.

But you know what? I don’t need a personal trainer for that. This baby boomer diva can come up with plenty of excuses on any given day to keep her from working out. You see, I've got something called MENOPAUSE on my side!

Hot Flashes in this Heat!

Is it just me or is anyone else trying to figure out if they’re having hot flashes while exercising or is it just this unbearable, intense heat wave we’re experiencing?

I woke up this morning at 7:15 am---I was going to head out to the Duke Trail to get my morning walk/run in. I turned on the TV. It was already 77 degrees and the humidity was over 80! OK…I had to ask myself, “Am I going to go out there and perspire like a pig like I did yesterday?”

Yesterday’s temperature was 75 degrees when I woke up but the humidity was in the lower 70s. I figured I could handle that so I took my bottled water and off I went. I hadn’t even walked a quarter of a mile when I began sweating profusely! I thought I was having a hot flash! I took a swig of water. It was hot enough to make tea. People were passing me left and right. One woman passed me wearing makeup! And to top it all off, she didn’t have a drop of sweat on her face. I figured she must be testing a new product because it made absolutely no sense to be wearing makeup in that heat. Or maybe she was hoping to catch the eye of one of those sweaty baby boomer men who came running by.

Well, I decided not to go to the trail today. Besides, I have a gym membership so this would be a good day to use it---even if I have to drive 15 miles to get there. Another thing…I’d much rather have a hot flash in the gym because of a thing called air conditioning.

Robin Roberts' Breast Cancer Diagnosis is an URGENT Wake-Up Call

This week’s announcement that Good Morning America anchor Robin Roberts has breast cancer came as a complete shock to me.

I couldn’t believe it when I heard the news!. I always thought of Robin as the epitome of good health but this just goes to show you that cancer can strike anyone at anytime.

In her own words, Robin outlined how she came to discover the cancer:

“It all started a few weeks ago. We had gotten the news that our dear colleague and friend Joel Siegel had passed away and we began preparing for our special tribute show for him. I did a piece about Joel's courageous battle with cancer, reporting on the way my friend had lived his life and been such a successful advocate for the importance of early cancer screenings. That very night when I went to bed, I did a self breast exam and found something that women everywhere fear: I found a lump.

At first I thought, "This can't be. I am a young, healthy woman." Nevertheless, I faced my fear head on and made an appointment to see the doctor. Much as I was hoping the doctor would say it was nothing, she did a biopsy and confirmed that the lump I'd found was indeed an early form of breast cancer. Hearing the doctor say those words out loud was surreal.”

Just last year I was so excited when Robin agreed to read a copy of my book Whatever! A Baby Boomer's Journey Into Middle Age. I named her one of my “Spectacular Baby Boomer Divas” in the book.

I'm really glad she caught her breast cancer early because that may have saved her life and her actions should be a wake-up call for ALL women---especially African-American women. We must be vigilant when it comes to our health. What happened to Robin can happen to any one of us and if we ignore it we are doomed.

Online Dating has its Pitfalls

Beverly Mahone, author of the book, Whatever! A Baby Boomer's Journey Into Middle Age, says not everyone is giving a thumbs up to internet dating. In her latest podcast, Ms. Mahone interviews an Ohio woman who says all of her on-line experiences have been negative. “While there have been many success stories involving sites like match.com, babyboomerpeoplemeet.com and findlovehere.com”, says Ms. Mahone, “on-line dating doesn’t end happily-ever-after for everybody.”

This week’s 56-year-old guest tells Ms. Mahone the majority of men she met on-line were only interested in one thing---sex. She also says she met a number of men who were already married but looking for a chic on the side.

While researching the topic for her show, the baby boomer author and expert discovered over seven million people have used an on-line dating service and the numbers are rising rapidly among middle-aged adults.


Ms. Mahone says although she personally had good fortune with internet dating because that’s how she met her current husband, she also realizes it can have its drawbacks. “I was skeptical in the very beginning because there are a lot of kooks out there and you really never know who’s who.”

Please check out my podcast on the lower right side of this blog.

Who's Responsible When Young Black Men Kill?

How much blame rests on the shoulder of my baby boomer generation for the destructive behavior of the YZ generation?


News from the Friday, July 20 edition of the Los Angeles Times:

LAPD Southwest: Aric Lexing, 26, and Scott Grant, 40, both black men, were shot to death in a double homicide in the 4000 block of Stevely Drive in lower Baldwin Hills at about 3:30 a.m. Friday, July 20. Both men died at the scene. They were seated in a parked vehicle when they were shot. One of the victims got out of the car with a gunshot wound in his chest, made it about 40 feet and collapsed. The second was lying dead in the passenger seat. Police seek help. (213) 485-2417.

Aric had just received his Master's Degree from a College in Louisiana and moved to the Los Angeles area to be closer to his mom and other family members while waiting to find out if he would be accepted to the Police or Border Patrol Academy. He would never find out due to his senseless murder.

His mom, Ora Stearns-Smith is a dear friend of mine. She is like a sister to me--a baby boomer diva in every sense of the word---a woman who reminds me how wonderful God truly is even when I have my doubts. She didn't deserve to have this tragedy happen in her life. She's suffered enough. Just last November she lost her brother to gun violence. He was murdered by some foster children he had taken in---over a cell phone---Two years ago she lost her oldest daughter to a brain tumor.

What in the world has happened to the YZ generation of children who seem to have no fear and no regard for human life? Are we, as baby boomers, somehow responsible for not reaching out more in some way?

I used to believe in praying for the lost soul---but I'm more and more convinced that some lost souls just don't give a damn about being found.

BOOMER WORLD: This Baby Boomer Inquiring Mind Wants to Know

BOOMER WORLD: This Baby Boomer Inquiring Mind Wants to Know

Baby Boomer Love on the Internet

Can you find love on the internet---especially if you’re over 40? I did it and I even introduced some friends of mine to it and they, too, made a successful connection. I didn’t initially go online because I was looking for a husband. I was just looking for some companionship. My experience was good in the end but I had to weed through some garbage to get there. For every decent individual out there in cyberspace, there are at least a dozen weirdoes, freaks, and others who give the concept a black eye. But nonetheless, based on the research I did I found that according to recent statistics, on-line dating services now help over 7 million registered users a year. 48 percent of men and 52 percent of women have had some experience with on line dating.

According to a recent article in Newsweek magazine, more and more baby boomers are quote unquote “hooking up” on line. And according to the publisher of Online dating magazine, “As people get older, they start dropping a lot of the “you gotta be attractive” requirements and concentrate more on personality, spirituality and specific interests.

Check out my latest podcast: Finding Love on the Internet Part I (on the right lower side of this page)

How to Keep your Sex Life Sizzlin' after 50!

I'm not ashamed to tell you that my husband makes me hotter than a hot flash! We share a healthy sex life because we share INTIMACY. That intimacy takes us beyond the bedroom and into each other's hearts and minds.

If you're trying to enhance or re-create the sexual magic in your relationship, here are a few tips:

Manage Your Menopause
Symptoms may begin up to 10 years before you reach the menopause at 50. As your body stops producing estrogen, your interest in sex naturally diminishes. Althought I'm NOT AN ADVOCATE of hormone replacement therapy, some doctors say hormone replacement therapy (HRT) can be incredibly effective, helping to give your sex drive a boost as well as reducing symptoms such as hot flashes. There are lots of treatments, including sprays, creams and patches, so consult your doctor. Natural alternatives include the red clover and agnus castus supplements.

Banish Guilt
Just because you're 50 (or older) doesn't mean that you shouldn't want sex. Sex is a natural part of life. It connects the passion between a couple and there's no reason for you not to enhance and appreciate your sexuality.

Check Your Medication
Certain drugs are known to lower your libido, so it's worth checking out side effects. Culprits include medicines for heart disease, blood pressure, arthritis and high cholesterol, among others. Ask your doctor if there's an alternative you could try.

Test Your Hormones
Testosterone is important for sex drive in women and men, and a deficiency can lead to a dwindling interest.
Other symptoms include depression, fatigue, memory and concentration problems. See your doctor for blood tests.

There's no reason you shouldn't turn up the heat of passion in your relationship—even after 50.

Fabulously 50 and Happy!

I am having the time of my life! I never imagined that 50 years old could feel this good. After all, when I was a little girl the age of 50 seemed ancient and everyone I knew who was around that age acted like they had no more spunk left and was just waiting for the day when they could retire.

Well, no retirement for me anytime soon. Actually I don’t have a regular 9 to 5 to retire from but I consider that a blessing. I am not stressed out in a job where I’m underpaid and overworked and having to answer to someone young enough to be one of my children. I am doing what I love---writing and spreading positive messages about aging gracefully. “Enjoy the Journey!” I invite you to read why I'm so deliriously happy in my book Whatever! A Baby Boomer's Journey Into Middle Age.

OK, so I’ve gone up a couple of dress sizes and I have a little extra jiggle when I walk but I’m doing it with dignity and style and not trying to squeeze into a size 2 or 4 or 6 for that matter. Yes, menopause and its host of annoying symptoms have come knocking at my door, but you know what I say to that? WHATEVER!

My love life couldn’t be better. I have a wonderful NEW husband who makes me hotter than a hot flash! We just celebrated our one year anniversary and I look forward to many more years of making him as happy as he makes me. He truly is the wind beneath my wings---not like my first husband who blew a lot of hot air!

So ladies, my advice to you is to take every negative in your life and find a positive. Sure, you’ll have days when you don’t want to get out of bed and face the world---try facing God instead---and have Him give you that nudge you need.

One more thing: Keep on PUSH—ing (Pray Until Something Happens!)

Baby Boomer Ignites Fireworks Early in the Nation's Capital

With a declaration of “I’m still Hot…it just comes in Flashes now!” Baby Boomer Author Beverly Mahone tells women in the Washington, DC area to enjoy their menopause.

In a guest appearance on the Fox 5 Morning News Show today, the 50-year-old self-proclaimed baby boomer diva said women have nothing to be ashamed of when going through the change of life. “It’s all a part of the aging process and it should be embraced with dignity, grace and style,” she asserts. In addition, she believes it is important to encourage women to take hot flashes in stride and to work hard to improve their physical and mental health. “Complaining about what ails you isn’t going to accomplish anything but frustration,” says Ms. Mahone. “Instead, we must focus on the transition as another phase of our journey in life and celebrate the fact that we’ve come this far.”

Ms. Mahone’s visit to the Nation’s Capital is a part of a summer tour for her book, Whatever! A Baby Boomer’s Journey Into Middle Age. In addition to Washington, DC, she has also made stops in North Carolina, Maryland, Virginia and PA. She plans to visit several more states in the near future, including Atlanta and New York City.

Ms. Mahone says she is inspired by the attitudes of the women she’s met so far. “We’re finally starting to take menopause out of the closet. Back in the ‘60s James Brown had a song called “Say it Loud, I’m Black and I’m Proud. Well, in 2007 I’m saying “Say it Loud, I’m Menopausal and Proud,” laughs Ms. Mahone.

Menopause Myth #5

Menopause leads to other deadly diseases.

First of all, menopause is NOT a disease. It is a natural occurrence in a woman's life. It is a part of the aging process.

Depending on how intense your menopausal symptoms are, you may want to seek some type of treatment. I don't advocate synthetic drugs but that's just me. I have found natural herbal supplements coupled with a diet rich in whole grains, vegetables and fruits work wonders for me.

What is important to remember is you should take good care of yourself by eating healthy and getting some exercise. When I exercise on a consistent basis, my hot flashes are kept to a minimum. Exercise is also a wonderful way to help you maintain a healthy weight. Excess fat CAN lead to other medical problems.

To learn more about how to enjoy your menopause and to learn how to live drama free with a dash of humor, why not pick up a copy of my book, "Whatever! A Baby Boomer's Journey Into Middle Age" available on Barnes and Noble.com and Amazon.com.

Menopause Myth #4

If you're under the age of 45, you're TOO YOUNG to be menopausal.

OH, SO WRONG!!!

It might be unusual for a woman to go through menopause before the age of 45 but it's definitely not impossible. There are women in their mid to late thirties who have been known to experience what is known as perimenopause. The symptoms include:

mood swings
depression
tension headaches
vaginal dryness
lack of sexual drive
inability to focus
night sweats
hot flashes
sleep problems
joint and muscle pain
irregular periods

There are actually 34 symptoms associated with perimenopause and menopause.

If you're experiencing some of these symptoms, talk with your doctor. There is a test you can take to confirm whether or not you're going through the change. And don't accept medication as the end all answer for what ails you---especially if someone wants to give you anti-depressants.

For more information on how to enjoy your menopause, I invite you to purchase a copy of my book, Whatever! A Baby Boomer's Journey Into Middle Age available on Amazon.com and Barnes and Noble.com.

Let's enjoy this journey together!

Menopause Myth #3

There is a cure for Menopause.

No, there is NO CURE but there are measures you can take to ease some of the symptoms associated with menopause. For example, to relieve hot flashes cut back on spicy foods and alcohol. Since it's summer, wear lighter clothing. This also means wear brighter colors. Dark colors like black and brown draw heat and can make you even more uncomfortable.

Get up, get out and exercise and make sure you pump some iron. Also, it's equally important to maintain a healthy diet which should include lots of green vegetables and grains.

For more information on coping with menopause and other middle age issues, I encourage you to pick up a copy of my book: Whatever! A Baby Boomer's Journey Into Middle Age. It's available on amazon.com. and Barnes & Noble.com

Menopause Myth #2

MYTH #2

If you haven’t had a period in several months, you can go off the pill and assume you’re in menopause.

WRONG!

For many women, irregular periods may last several years. The best way to determine whether you have gone into full blown menopause is when you have gone one complete year (12 months) without having a menstrual cycle.

Going off the pill during your erratic periods is not a good idea because you may be vulnerable to getting pregnant.

I’m Taking my Hot Flashes on Tour!

This week I'm kicking off my summer book tour with "Whatever! A Baby Boomer's Journey Into Middle Age." Tagging along with me will be the seven dwarfs of menopause (along with some of their annoying cousins). I'd love to leave them at home with my husband but, just like me, he's had to endure them and, bless his heart, they've been harder on him sometimes than on me. So I'm packing them up and taking them with me. Oh what fun this should be...me, and hot flashes, having one HOT time!

On Wednesday, I'll be doing an interview on Fox 8 in High Point, NC and Thursday, I'll be in Charlotte on Fox 18 "Fox News Rising"...followed by a book signing ay Park Road Books. If you're in the area, please stop by and say hello...and drop off some of your own hot flashes!

And to top it all off I'll be turning the big 5-0 on June 21!

Myths about Menopause

Myth #1

When you go into menopause your sex life is over.

WRONG!

One of the symptoms of perimenopause and menopause is vaginal dryness and the hormonal imbalance can trigger a lack of desire but just like everything else, you can overcome it.

There are plenty of vaginal creams on the market to help soothe the dryness and a vitamin E pill inserted in the vagina can also do the trick.

As far as the lack of sexual desire, you may have to work a little harder on creating the mood mentally and physically but it can be done. Take yourself back to a time in your relationship when the lovin was incredible and meditate on that. Also, don't be afraid to let your mate know what you like and don't like. If he loves you and wants to please you, he shouldn't have any problem doing it your way.

My husband makes me hotter than a hot flash because we have learned how to communicate effectively in the bedroom.


I’m Packin’ up my Menopause and Headin’ South

This week I'm kicking off my summer book tour with "Whatever! A Baby Boomer's Journey Into Middle Age." Tagging along with me will be the seven dwarfs of menopause (along with some of their annoying cousins). I'd love to leave them at home with my husband but, just like me, he's had to endure them and, bless his heart, they've been harder on him sometimes than on me. So I'm packing them up and taking them with me. Oh what fun this should be...me, and hot flashes, having one HOT time!

On Wednesday, June 20th I'm making a guest appearance on the Fox8 Morning News Show in Greensboro/High Point. On Thursday, June 21, its on to Charlotte, NC where I will be a guest on Fox News Rising (Fox18). At noon, I will be doing a book signing at Park Roads Books, also in Charlotte.

Now it just so happens that Thursday, June 21---the first day of summer---is also my 50th birthday so I guess me and the dwarfs are all gonna be celebrating this new milestone together.

If you’d like to schedule me and my menopause crew for an interview, book signing or as a guest speaker, please contact me directly at 301-356-6280 or via email at bmahone@nc.rr.com

A Pill to Delay to Menopause? Whatever!

Apparently some doctors in London are in the process of developing a drug that would slow down the natural occurrence known as menopause. According to a report in the London Daily Mail...“The dramatic news came from fertility expert Professor Robert Winston. He told a conference that researchers had found a protein which they believe could be developed into a pill or an injection to extend the life of women’s eggs. This would give new hope for the thousands of women who find themselves left childless in later life.”

My question is, are older women really so desperate to have children? What were they doing in their 20s and 30s? Even if they discovered they couldn’t have children why would anyone want to wait until their 40s, 50s or even 60s to consider giving birth? Having and raising a child isn’t easy at ANY age!

I find it interesting that this new so-called breakthrough is being developed by male doctors. Is this a sick joke or another attempt by some to slow down the aging process for self-gratification?

You can read the complete article to the right of this blog.

Working Out Doesn't Guarantee a Long Life...

Earlier this month I wrote a post about baby boomers and death (May 8). I wrote it after observing a grave site service in which there were fewer than a dozen elderly people in attendance. I was reminded of that post today when I went to the gym.

I saw an employee I hadn’t seen in awhile and she was catching me up on the “gang.” I learned that my dear, sweet friend Marvin passed away. Marvin was an 84-year-old wonderful man who LIVED in the gym. He always had a smile on his face and was always giving you a hug upon entering and leaving the gym. We developed a bond. He even went to church with me a couple of times and I tagged along with him once to see how the Methodists worshipped. Marvin apparently died after having a stroke late last year.

Linda Ross was another gym buddy. I didn’t know her as well as Marvin. I just remember her rushing into our aerobics class after finishing her chemotherapy treatments. She died a few months ago of breast cancer.

And then there was the man I wrote about in my book, Whatever! A Baby Boomer’s Journey Into Middle Age. He was the one who worked out while carrying an oxygen tank strapped around his waist. I admired his tenacity so much. He inspired me to get off my fat butt. He, too, passed away.

I feel bad about having stayed away from the gym for so long. I never got to get my last hug from Marvin or to see Linda’s smiling face. I never got to let the man with the oxygen tank know I had written about him. All I can say now is if there’s a gym in Heaven, I know they’re all there and plenty of folks are being blessed by their presence.

College Reunion

My College Reunion is taking place this weekend. Hard to believe I've been out of college---not high school---for nearly 30 years!

I had planned to attend, however, Ohio University was unwilling to pay for my travel expenses to come speak as a representative of the school of Journalism. I guess if my name had been Matt Lauer, there wouldn't have been an issue. Oh, but wait a minute---Matt didn't even graduate and I DID. So what's wrong with that picture? I'll let you draw your own conclusions.

Bragging Rights of a Baby Boomer Diva Grandma

When my daughter was younger, I used to love to show off her advanced learning skills. She was walking at eight months, speaking coherently at a year and a half and writing her first and last name at the age of three (and I have the picture to prove it).

Now I have a grandson and, just as I did with my daughter, I take great pride in showing off his advanced skills. At seven months, he started taking steps. As a matter of fact, he started trying to walk before he was crawling. Now, he’s trying to walk all over the place and is into EVERYTHING! No, he’s not speaking yet but I’m convinced he knows the five vowels and shortly he’ll be able to count to ten in Spanish thanks to the TV show Handy Mandy.

My “public” bragging moment came yesterday when I took my grandson with me to Harris Teeter. We were the checkout line when he apparently caught the attention of another little baby and her mom. June, I learned, was seven months old. She just seemed to be in awe of my little man. Maybe because he was dressed to kill in his Duke Blue Devils outfit complete with matching hat. Anyway, June’s mom brought her over to our line to interact with my grandson whose attention was elsewhere. Eventually, their eyes met and he let out a great big smile which revealed his two bottom teeth. He also waved at her and she tried to wave back. June’s mom could not get over the fact that my grandson knew how to wave correctly.

Now let me explain this. When you see babies wave, they tend to wave backwards. What I mean by that is the palm of their hand faces them instead of the other way around. Why? Because when parents are trying to teach them to wave “bye-bye”, their palm of their hand is facing the baby’s eye and that’s what they see. So what I did was turn my hand around so that the back of my hand faced him as I repeatedly said “bye-bye.” He processed what I was doing and got it right!

OK…this may seem like a small deal to you but if my grandson is going to be a future president, he might as well get that wave thing down early! Next week I'll be teaching him about the Law of Attraction.

A Baby Boomer Diva's Guide to Shopping for Mother's Day

As long as I can remember, Mother's Day has always been the second Sunday in May. It's one of those holidays where the DATE might change but the time of the month NEVER does. Since this is a well known fact, why is it that people choose to wait until "D" day to go out and buy Mother's Day gifts and cards?

I was one of those people. I went to Wal-Mart today to try to find a nice little gift for my mother-in-law. I didn't want to get her anything too fancy because she would just end up hiding it---never to be found again (she has Alzheimer's). I thought flowers would be a nice touch. It would brighten up her bedroom and maybe trigger some memories back to the time when she used to care for the flowers in her own garden. Well, that was a bad idea. Everybody in the world was obviously thinking the SAME thing. The flower buckets were nearly wiped out. I had to be creative and try to mix and match flowers---without getting caught.

Then I went over to the card section. You would think Wal-Mart was having some kind of special on cards. The racks were empty. The only few cards I saw were some that had June Clever on the front and that just wasn't going to work for my mother-in-law. She may have had a June Clever like image back in the day---but the card company could've at least had the decency to make another June Clever image look more "soulful."

I figured I might have better luck at the dollar store down the street from my house so I went there. It was also JAM PACKED with people purchasing Mother's Day items. It was CRAZY! While I was in the store I had to play mom to someone else's children because they were getting out of line.

So what did I learn today?

1) If you have to wait until the last minute, don't shop. Give the gift after the fact. It'll mean more.

2) Buy silk flowers instead---even if the price is jacked up. They last forever.

3) Shop around for cards that fit the "image" you're looking for. June Clever ain't it and neither is "Florida" from Good Times.

4) A mother is a 24/7 job--no matter whose children they are!

OK...I admit it...This Baby Boomer Diva is Computer Illiterate

I never thought I would ever go more than a few hours without being on my computer. It has become an addiction over the past year. I would rather be on the computer than clean my house. But on Monday morning, I got a major reality check when the machine crashed on me and kicked out all of the email contact data I had worked so hard to build. Plus, I was unable to do any of my normal networking. What's worst is I didn't (and still don't) have a clue as to how to fix the problem.

This frustrating situation got me to thinking about my life. What has happened to my life that I can't seem to live without a computer? It wasn't that long ago that I didn't even want to be bothered with the damn thing.

This frustrating situation also got me to thinking about how much more important it is to remain positive and focused when negativity and disasterous circumstances occur around you. The forces of negativity can be very powerful if you let it and it will seep into your own spirit and change your positive energy before you know it.

I must go back to the drawing board and re-examine my priorities.

A Baby Boomer's Look at Death

I was driving past a cemetary the other day and observed a graveside service. I assumed the person who died was old because all of the people paying their last respects were old. But what struck me even more so was the fact that there were so few people there. Was it because the deceased wasn't liked very much or maybe it was because the majority of his or her friends were already dead?

It got me to thinking. We spend a whole lifetime building and cultivating relationships but the longer we live, the fewer friends we end up having in the end. It's a morbid thought for a baby boomer diva who, at this moment, is so full of life.

But we, as baby boomers, must come to terms with the fact that at some point all of is will also travel down that road to final rest. Maybe it's time to make some new "younger" friends.

Beverly and the Baby Boomer Usherettes

I'm a member of the Women's Usher Board at my church. I joined the group because I wanted to carry on a tradition my father started. He was a member of the Usher Board at the church I was raised in and this was my way of carrying on that tradition and being of service to God.

To be perfectly honest, I don't feel very connected to the majority of the group. I actually feel like an outcast and often question why I don't just quit. Maybe because I'm relatively new and the majority of them seem to have known each other for years and have deep ties. But on this particular Saturday, I must admit I did have fun. I discovered through this group that there really are just six degrees of separation between us. I was surprised to learn that some of my fellow usherettes and I were connected through other people I've known a lot longer than them. I also learned some of us shared things in common like bowling---an activity I used to participate in regularly some years ago. I discovered I was in the company of teachers, researchers, HR Specialists, retirees, police officers and fellow baby boomer divas who, despite, all of our other differences, all have a true love for God and can share a good laugh. And yes, some of us can relate to hot flashes and menopause.

So the next time we all usher together at church, I'll be looking at them in a different light and I'm hopeful they'll see something different in me as well.

Is it Gym Sweat or a Hot Flash?

I just returned from another invigorating 40 minutes of aerobics at the gym. This is the only place where I can sweat like a pig and not freak out about it being a hot flash.

I must admit, working out these days is quite a challenge, especially when a hot flash seems to be the order of the day. It's also tougher since I seem to see little or no results for my efforts. My doctor says the weight gain is all a part of growing older and that I should keep exercising for health maintenance. WHATEVER! I want more than maintenance. I want to see some pounds drop off EVERY TIME I go into the gym. When I've finished my workout, I want to pick up my towel and water bottle and leave about five pounds of fat on the gym floor. Well actually I would have the decency to pick it up and throw it away because just leaving it there would be gross!

I'm really not complaining because I really do thank God that I'm able to get up and go workout because I know there are others who can't for one reason or another. And yes, the sweat is good because not only am I releasing toxins...I finally realize the gym is about the only place I can enjoy my "personal summer!"

Hello menopause! Welcome to MY world.

Where are all of the Baby Boomer Men?

Since I’ve been networking on line, this baby boomer diva has searched long and hard (excuse the pun) to find where the baby boomer men hang out. Not that I’m looking because I have a man---thank you very much---and he’s a fine baby boomer man!

I’m just curious if baby boomer men network on line like women do. Is there a site exclusively for them? I see scatterings of men here and there who kind of blend in with the rest of the crowd but I can’t say that I’ve seen them in clusters.

Why aren’t they getting together and talking about their so-called male menopause? Why aren’t they exchanging information and advice on the best sports cars to buy; the best exercises to keep them vigorous in the bedroom; or gathering business tips? Could it be that baby boomer men are several steps behind us baby boomer women when it networking on the almighty internet? God forbid!

The internet is probably the best place for baby boomer men to find out what’s going on with their wives and menopause. If they’ve ever been caught in the midst of a hot flash tantrum, there’s a woman somewhere who is more than willing to offer advice. Surely, we’re all out here talking about the symptoms and how our men just don’t quite understand it all.

Listen up guys, why don’t you come to the internet table and join us for some engaging discussions. We guarantee you’ll learn a thing or two!

Baby Boomer Celebrity will Judge my Mother's Day Contest

I was on the phone talking to my husband when my other line beeped in. When I clicked over the voice on the other end said, "Hi Bev. This is Dwight Hicks. I'm sorry I'm just now getting back to you. I just saw your email." Well, I have to tell you I didn't remember off hand who Dwight Hicks was so I put him on hold and clicked back over to my husband. I told him about this man on the other line and I would see what he wanted and call "my man" back.

When I clicked back over to Dwight I had to ask him to refresh my memory because it was obvious I didn't remember. I joked and said, "When you talk to as many people as I do in a day it's hard to remember them all!" Then he said, "Remember, you wanted to interview me. I'm played for the 49ers."

Then it hit me like a ton of brick!!! I was talking with two-time super bowl champion Dwight Hicks! Oh, my God! I do remember putting in an interview request with his agent more than a month ago but when I didn't hear back I just assumed it wasn't going to happen. He was so gracious and so easy to talk to. I set up the interview and then realized I needed another judge for the Mother's Day contest. So what did i do? I just asked him point blank: "Would you consider being a judge for my Mother's Day Contest?"

He said, "Yes, sure!"

OK now here's where I wanted to scream on the telephone but I maintained my composure and told him the details and then he offered to donate an autographed photo of himself to one of the winners. OK...that's good.

So yesterday I got a two-for-one with Dwight Hicks. This is just one more example of how God really works because just the day before I was asking my husband where I was going to find another judge since Nikki Giovanni couldn't do it (because of the shooting investigation).

Will YOUR ESSAY be the one Dwight likes the best? You won't know if you don't enter. Entry deadline is May 9. Send entries to: babyboomervalentine@gmail.com

Mother's Day Contest Update

What a difference 24 hours makes! Since announcing the contest, I've had several sponsors offer to donate a prize. So now it gets interesting because you know what they say: The better the prizes...the better the competition.

First Place: $50 Cash, Bath & Body Works Spa Pkg (Tracy Ehman), Never be Sick Again by Raymond Francis ; 30 minute Radio Interview on Heal Yourself Talk Radio with Rebecca White; :30 promotional ad on Beverly Mahone’s podcast “Whatever!” for your business or product; ***This is a great opportunity for self-promotion***
“Delayed but not Denied” Gospel CD by Jennifer Evans (www.jenniferevans7.com)

Second: My Little Taste of Italy Gift Basket (www.mylittletasteofitaly.com), Bella Bath & Body Bar and Neways Products offered by Tracy Lewis; autographed copy of Whatever! A Baby Boomer’s Journey Into Middle Age by Beverly Mahone (www.thebabyboomerdiva.com) & “Chill 2 This” Inspirational Jazz CD from Michael Houston. www.myspace.com/houstown

Third: Gano Excel Coffee Gift Basket donated by Tally Green, Mothers are Forever book by Criswell Freeman donated by www.EdenFlorist.com--our motto is "Make Someone Smile Today, Send Flowers!" (Heidi Richards, owner); Blockbuster Gift Card

Fourth: Twenty minute coaching session with Doris Helge, author of Joy on the Job (www.joyonthejob.info); autographed copy of “Delayed but not Denied” Gospel CD from Jennifer Evans (www.jenniferevans7.com); God can Handle Mothers by Carlene Ward donated by: Eden Florist - http://www.EdenFlorist.com - our motto is "Make Someone Smile Today, Send Flowers!" (Heidi Richards, owner)

Fifth: One hour of free Virtual Assistant Services plus 20 percent off on all products thru May 15 from www.KeyBusinessPartners.com and Teresa Morrow; Back to the Table with my Country Kitchen cookbook by Betty Lynch (www.bettylynch.biz).

Contest open to men and women because we know there were some hard-headed little boys growing up too!

See previous blog entry for contest details.

Mothers Day Contest

"Mama said there would be days like this!"

If you had a mama like I did, she spent most of her life trying to warn you against certain things and certain people. But if you were a young person like me, you didn't listen very well. My mama used to say "If you lie down with dogs, you're bound to get up with fleas!" My ex husband proved her point! My Big Mama (grandmother) used to say "Hard heads make soft behinds!"

In 800 words or LESS, write an essay about one warning in particular your mother gave you when you were younger but you failed to heed her advice and found out later that she was RIGHT all along. For example, she may have told you not to date a certain person but you did anyway and after a while you realized it was a mistake and you could hear your mother saying "I told you so!" Tell your story. It can be humorous or very serious. How you tell it will be more important than what the actual warning was.

First place winner will receive $50
Second place will receive an autographed copy of my book “Whatever! A Baby Boomer’s Journey Into Middle Age” PLUS a My trademark Hot Flash Survival Kit.
Third Place: The book “God Can Handle it for Mothers" by Carlene Ward (compliments of Heidi Richards)
Fourth Place: “Mothers are Forever” by Criswell Freeman (compliments of Heidi Richards
Fifth place will receive a gift card

I WILL NOT BE A JUDGE. I'm not going to announce the judges just yet pending confirmation.

Entry deadline is May 9th. Winners will be announced on Mother's Day. All entries should be sent to: babyboomervalentine@gmail.com with mother's day contest noted on the subject line.

There will be a special surprise for all entrants and it's open to EVERYONE.

Erectile Dysfunction v. Urinary Incontinence

OK...I need some answers here. Why is it that television ads for erectile dysfunction in older men seem to carry a more attractive and sexy tone while older women ads focus on the problems with wetting our pants at inconvenient moments?

I was on my way to bed when I saw an ad for erectile dysfunction. The older couple looked happy as they were getting ready for a rendezvous. Then what happens. The doorbell rings and company arrives. But never fear! The deep sexy voice of the male announcer tells us that little pill taken by the baby boomer hunk will last up to 36 hours. I don’t know about any other woman but I may not be in the mood in 36 hours so he may have wasted a pill.

Now on the flip side, during one of my favorite soap operas I saw an ad with a woman who looked a little frazzled because she had an "accident" in public and didn't want anyone to know. So day diapers to the rescue for her future. The next time she stepped out of her house she was as happy as a clam and no one had a clue it was because she felt so comfortable with her new thick diaper pads.

There's nothing sexy about having to take a pill to get an erection---and the promotion is that it lasts for hours. And it's even worse to tell the world to be on the lookout because I may have pee peed in my pants if I laugh hysterically.

"This has been a "meno moment" brought to you by the baby boomer drama queen."

OK…I’m off my soap box.

A Mother's Heartbreak

You can't be human and not feel some sense of the loss at Virginia Tech. Even though I don't know anyone there (except for Nikki Giovanni who reviewed the manuscript for my book), I have thought about the fact that I could've been the mother of any one of those students. I would imagine many, if not all, of the moms are baby boomer women like me; women who have worked hard to get their children to a point of becoming self sufficient and prepared to take on the world.

As a mom, I can relate to the pain the mothers of the victims must be feeling. I can identify with the array of emotions that must be taking a toll on them mentally, physically and spiritually. I send my daughter off to school everyday not thinking for one minute that she could become the victim of a shooter's rampage.

Sadly, we live in a time where the morals and values I grew up on have disappeared and we are now having to face the reality that some people don't value much of anything anymore---including life.

The "New" Face of Menopause

On Friday, my hubby and I did a photo shoot for the NY Times. A freelance photographer named Derrick was hired by the Times to shoot some pictures of us for an article one of their writers is doing on the humorous side of menopause. It’s my understanding that several women were interviewed for the article so it’ll be interesting to see how much is written about what I had to say.

Nate had to leave work early in order to be a part of the photo shoot. Since he’s a “behind the scenes” kind of guy, I can’t say he was thrilled to be participating but I know he did it because of his love for me and he is always willing to give a 100% effort to support what I’m doing.

OK…so what is it that I’m going? Well, I’m trying to get my name out there to the masses. I would like every woman who’s at least 35 years old to purchase a copy of my book Whatever! A Baby Boomer’s Journey Into Middle Age. It really is a good book and I’m not just saying that because I wrote it. If someone else had written the book in the same style in which I wrote it, I would still say it was a fantastic book! I’ve had many women I don’t know personally tell me how much they’ve enjoyed reading it---both black and white women. I was actually concerned about that because some of my former white colleagues said they don’t generally read books written by black authors because they feel the book isn’t targeted for them. Well, my book proves that menopause doesn’t discriminate. It is an equal opportunity annoyer!

Another thing is, I want to represent the "new" face of menopause. Just because a woman goes through the change doesn't mean she has to crawl under a rock and hide. Far from it! She should be struttin' her stuff---proudly like a peacock---and embracing the new journey with grace and dignity.

I have to tell you I am still in awe of how the NY Times writer found me out of ALL of the authors who have written books about menopause and other related baby boomer issues. Finding me was like finding a needle in a haystack because I have no name recognition. This is how I know I am a living testimony of how good God really is. This time last year I lost my job over this book.....I struggled to get it published.....was trying to plan my wedding and was dealing with some teenage daughter drama. I ended up with NO publisher and NO book distributor. But what I do have is a promise from God and He always keeps His Word. I just love how He takes ordinary people and creates extraordinary circumstances.

The NY Times article is scheduled to come out on Thursday, April 19. I hope you'll pick up a copy and tell me what you think.

Was I having a Hot Flash or What?

Last weekend, I promised my baby boomer diva girlfriend, Donna Maria, that I would support her Teen Fest 2K7 project. So today, I kept my word and went over to North Carolina Central University to watch the performances of several talented young people from Raleigh-Durham and the surrounding area.

Donna Maria, being the spectacular woman that she is, managed to get two celebrity male judges to help her out. They were men I recognized from back in the day AND they're actually baby boomers themselves. You remember Christopher "Play" Martin from the Kid-n-Play House Party Movies? And then there was Darryl "DMC" McDaniel from the musical group RUN-DMC. They were the pioneers of hip-hop---when hip hop was still respectable. I used to love that song "Walk this Way."

Well anyway, at intermission, I took the opportunity to go over to them and introduce myself and give them a copy of my book. (Actually, Christopher is on my email buddy list). I told Darryl to give his copy to his wife Zuri. I suggested Chris give it to his mom, at which time he informed me she had passed away last month. It was at that moment that I wanted to give him a bear hug but then I thought I might not want to let go of that fine baby boomer man so I kept my composure and offered my condolenses.

Now here's where it gets a little blurry. During my interaction with these fine gentlemen I started to feel a little flush. You know, it was like a nervous perspiration but then I thought "Oh, I'm too old to be getting THOSE kind of feelings because I'm going through menopause, so I must be having a hot flash!"

Well, whatever it was---it actually felt pretty good.

The Baby Boomer Diva Web of Fame

When someone thinks of a woman as a Diva they tend to think of her in the negative sense. Yes, she's talented BUT she's also what you would call high maintenance with her constant demands and the fact that she believes the world evolves around her. Probably Jennifer Lopez comes to mind because of the time she reportedly asked a record executive for fresh, piping-hot Cuban bread and his staff had to visit nearly a dozen bakeries to honor her request. She also wanted dozens of packets of Skittles -including the new sour flavor. And on top of that, she also wanted a gourmet meat selection, a separate cheese platter and crates of water and fruit and scented candles. Or what about actress Nicole Kidman who apparently didn't want to visit the hotel's gym in London and instead had the exercise equipment brought directly to her suite. OK...these are over the top requests in my opinion but you have to consider the source. These are YOUNG WOMEN who haven't lived long enough to appreciate the hardships of life.

So what is a Baby Boomer DIVA? Well, first of all she's a woman who was born between 1946 and 1964. She's someone who's been through the fire and the rainstorms of life and can still hold her head high with class, style, grace and dignity. Menopause has made her a little bit sassy but that's OK because she can afford to be.

She is:

D-ivine
I-nspired
V-ivacious
A-nointed (with a sprinkle of A-ttitude)

If you know a woman like that, she belongs on the Baby Boomer Diva Web of Fame on my website: www.thebabyboomerdiva.com.

The Italian word for Diva is "goddess." Need I say more?

Baby Boomer Diva Natalie Cole is Unforgettable

On Saturday, I had the privilege, honor and pleasure of sharing my day with Singer Natalie Cole. She and I were guest speakers at this year’s Women’s Empowerment Expo in Raleigh, NC.

The day started with a breakfast, where she mingled with other speakers and sponsors of the event. The baby boomer diva said she was surprised at being invited to “speak.” She thought her agent may have gotten the message wrong. She laughed and said she asked him, “Are you sure they don’t want me to sing?” Natalie was invited by Radio One and its billionaire baby boomer diva Cathy Hughes who, by the way, was also at the Expo. I took the opportunity to give each of them a copy of my book “Whatever! A Baby Boomer’s Journey Into Middle Age.”

Natalie looked absolutely stunning as she graced the stage in her two-piece fuschia suit. The sold-out crowd listened intently as Nat King Cole’s little princess talked about every woman’s favorite AND least favorite subject: men. We all have, what Natalie called, “a stupid gene” when it comes making choices about the type of man we want to spend the rest of our lives with. The baby boomer diva pointed to her own life as an example of how the stupid choices she made led to an abusive and controlling husband. She shared the fact that she stayed in the marriage longer than she should have because she didn’t think she could ever find anyone else who would love her. Imagine, someone as beautiful and talented as she is saying something like that?

She was straight-forward and candid about her longing to find someone like her father but ended up with people who were more like her mother—a mother with whom she never got along with very well. Those bad choices, she said, also led her to drugs and alcohol. But on Saturday, she stood proudly and proclaimed she has been in recovery for several years.

Natalie told the predominately female audience not to be anxious to find the right man by a certain age. She said until he comes, they should work on getting themselves together spiritually and physically and to take time to focus on the One who will always love them better than anyone else ever could. Natalie says her faith and connection to God has given her an inner peace to know that she doesn’t necessarily need a man to complete her.

Although she wasn’t asked to sing, the sexy songstress blessed the crowd with a song she said was one of her favorite by Des’ree:

Listen as your day unfolds
Challenge what the future holds
Try and keep your head up to the sky
Lovers, they may cause you tears
Go ahead release your fears
Stand up and be counted
Don't be ashamed to cry
You gotta be
You gotta be bad, you gotta be bold
You gotta be wiser, you gotta be hard
You gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger
You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm
You gotta stay together
All I know, all I know, love will save the day…

Upon completion, she received a standing ovation….and then it was my turn.

Beverly Mahone is a motivational speaker and author of the book, "Whatever! A Baby Boomer's Journey Into Middle Age." www.thebabyboomerdiva.com

Don't take "the change" too seriously

You sell your home heating system at a yard sale. (Hot flashes)

* The person you sleep with complains about snow piling up on the bed. (Nightsweats)

* Your husband jokes that instead of buying a wood stove, he is using you to heat the family room this winter. Rather than just saying you are not amused, you shoot him. (Mood swings)

* You write post-it notes with your kid's names on them. (Memory loss)

Your husband comes home from work ready for a little whoopee and your response is, "If you value your life you won't touch me!" (Irritability)

* The phenobarbital dose that wiped out the Heaven's Gate Cult gives you four hours of decent rest. (Sleeplessness)

* You find Guacamole in your hair after a Mexican dinner. (Fatigue)

* You change your underwear after every sneeze. (Mild incontinence)

* You need Jaws Of Life to help you out of your car after returning home from an Italian restaurant. (Sudden weight gain)

* You ask Jiffy Lube to give you a vaginal lube job. (Dryness)

* You take a sudden interest in "Wrestlemania". (Female hormone deficiency)

* You're on so much estrogen that you take your Brownie troop on a field trip to Chippendales. (Hormone therapy)

Enjoy the journey 'cause there's no turning back.

Beverly Mahone
Author
Whatever! A Baby Boomer's Journey Into Middle Age
www.thebabyboomerdiva.com